No Joe today
Well, Joe the Totally Uncommitted Voter couldn’t make it today—it appears he’s too busy creating jobs and investing his Social Security whatsis. So we’ll have to fall back on . . .
Arbitrary but Fun Friday!
If all goes well, it’s a pretty safe bet that we are now less than three weeks away from the beginning of the Era of Joe Lieberman’s Complete and Utter Irrelevance to American Politics. (Which reminds me that this ancient post is still relevant today! Hey. Why didn’t any of you good people come and visit me at TPM Café?) So: for this ABFF, what else are you looking forward to in November? Remember to preface all comments with “if all goes well,” and please remember to sacrifice a chicken (or a vegetarian option of your choice!) before making your wish. Meanwhile, Jamie and I will continue to hang out in the lobby of the Albuquerque Convention Center and hope that a room in our hotel opens up in the next hour or two.
"If all goes well...” I won’t get punched out in whatever bar I find myself in Arizona November 4th as I scream and jump up and down as Wolf Blitzer announces that Barack Hussein Obama has just become the next President of the United States! Heh. Top that!
(OK, OK, full disclosure--I’ll be in Sedona Arizona! So getting punched out may not be quite as big a threat as I just suggested. I don’t know, maybe someone will toss a handful of crystals at my chakra?)Posted by on 10/17 at 02:24 PM
"If all goes well...” I’ll be buying a plumbing business, earning 280K a year, and getting that tax cut John McCain promised me so I can finally pay off the 1200 bucks in back taxes I owe.
Hell, maybe I’ll even get licensed!
Things are looking up. Now if some Americans could just buy back Budweiser. I don’t want to drink no European beer.Posted by on 10/17 at 02:44 PM
"If all goes well...”, I hope to see Prop 8 go down in CA so my lesbian friends can marry.
I’ll start a pool on which Supreme Court justice will retire on Jan 21. (Kennedy, Ginsburg).
But mostly I look forward to seeing my enemies driven before me, hear the lamentations of their women. The usual.Posted by PseudoNoise on 10/17 at 03:05 PM
"If all goes well...” in November I’ll be looking forward to not yet giving birth. Mainly that. Also, a lovely Thanksgiving that involves no car travel on our part with family and/or friends.Posted by on 10/17 at 03:58 PM
"if all goes well” i’ll be looking forward to the months of november, december, and most of january, when i can still believe that a democratic administration (w/ democratic congress in tow) will always take the high road, will be immune to the forces of greed and corruption, and will in no way be as susceptbile to the one-party foibles foisted on us by the bushies.
captcha: “nations,” as in—one other thing I can look forward to is showing my face in other “nations” without wincing and dropping my shoulders in a self-deprecating cringe.
welcome back to the blogosphere, dr. b—it’s good to see you’re still in fine (and ferocious) fettle.Posted by on 10/17 at 04:10 PM
"So: for this ABFF, what else are you looking forward to in November? to preface all comments with ‘if all goes well’”:
“If all goes well...” I will complete the annual Turkey Trot race in record time despite three weeks of non stop celebrations for the democratic sweep of local, regional and national elections.
Punica granatum martinis anyone?Posted by on 10/17 at 04:18 PM
If all goes well, Ms. Palin will slink back to Alaska only to get mired in corruption prosecutions and never be heard from again.
Oh, and in December, the Browns will beat the Steelers.Posted by on 10/17 at 04:52 PM
If all goes well I wish to sit down with all my good liberal friends and tell them, “I told you so” when they were telling me that Obama was blowing it, that he had to go negative, that Palin was untouchable because attacking her would appear “sexist,” that Obama was too “elitist” to win, that the trip to Europe was a mistake, and that McCain was going to squeak out the win.
“I was right,” I will say, “and you were wrong. I told you so.”
And then we will all buy each other quite a bit of beer.Posted by on 10/17 at 04:53 PM
Yer dreamin’, m.ho...it’s the Stillers’ year and your “Browns” can’t stop ‘em.
If all goes well, November will bring cures for all cancers, the permanent end of religious meddling in the public sphere, and Peace On Earth. (I do not expect all to go well.)Posted by on 10/17 at 05:00 PM
If all goes well, I will be happily stunned that my new home state, North Carolina, has ousted Libby Dole and not been painted red for President for the first time since 1976.Posted by on 10/17 at 05:04 PM
hear, hear nashe! “If all goes well”, we’ll say the same for Virginia, and i’ll have a fat spliff in celebration. i can’t BELIEVE Gilmore thinks he has a chance against Warner.Posted by on 10/17 at 05:34 PM
If all goes well, there will be a couple of days in early Nov when we can pause and say “Hmm, that went well.” The onerous consequences of change will not be stilled for long and we’ll realize that the problem wasn’t solved, it changed. If all goes well then, we’ll make some mistakes we’ve never tried before.Posted by black dog barking on 10/17 at 05:43 PM
black dog buzzkillPosted by on 10/17 at 06:00 PM
If all goes well, I, being a representative here of “the non-US part of the world” will be looking forward to at least eight years of not getting the shaft by US interests. Then, when I have finished looking forward to this non-shafting while smoking my cuban victory cigar and drinking up my (French, obviously) Champagne, I will begin working in local politics to help our politicans ride the wave of renewed faith in left-wing politics (even though, let’s face it, Obama is not as left as the right likes to think) to victory in the Norwegian elections next year around this time. THEN I will crush Scandinavian right-wing populism, see it driven before me, and hear the lamentation of its women. It’s all in a day’s work. If all goes well. So exnay on the occytoberay suprisay. Okikay? We’re counting on you guys. Kthxbai.
Captcha: example. As in: you guys set an example for the rest of the world. And it has been sorta kinda less than awesome these past eight years. I swear, that captcha box is prescient.Posted by Martin G. on 10/17 at 06:12 PM
If all goes well, historians will begin their calculations: Was George Bush the very worst and most pernicious president in American history, or merely in the top five? (Of course, if all goes unwell, the historians will do the same.)
If all goes well, I will feel a little more hopeful that the poor, the hungry, the homeless, and the uninsured in this nation will be able to feel a little more secure—though the tanking economy is worrisome on that count. (Support your local food banks, folks. If your 401k just lost $25,000, you’re doing well enough to help those who are much less fortunate.)
Wait, those aren’t fun arbitrarinesses. If all goes well, Canada’s population will shrink as all those American expats return to the U.S. Remember all the people who said they’d move to Canada if Reagan/Bush 1/Bush 2 was elected/reelected? Did any of them actually go? If they did, they’ll come back. They will be bringing lots of Molson, and the rest of us will be able to skip making a beer run.Posted by Orange on 10/17 at 06:25 PM
If all goes well, Brian Moore will turn out to be a pretty good President.
What Brian Moore will be doing whether or not all goes well.Posted by on 10/17 at 06:37 PM
If all goes well, I will be scrounging to find a place to stay in DC the third week of January for the inauguration.
Oh, and if all goes well, my parents’ Representative, Michelle Bachmann, will receive a message from God and Minnesota voters that she should take some time off from politics.
Captcha: least. As in, at least I eventually made it out of that TPM comment thread alive. Whoo boy.Posted by on 10/17 at 06:49 PM
If all goes well, we could witness the start of a new [Sen.] Al Franken Decade.
Also, what PseudoNoise said.Posted by on 10/17 at 07:19 PM
As in, at least I eventually made it out of that TPM comment thread alive. Whoo boy.
Wasn’t that something? Between “offensivetoyou” and “kozmik,” it was like the World Center of Unfun.Posted by Michael on 10/17 at 07:43 PM
If all goes well, my fear of hordes of outraged yahoos rioting, and engaging in political violence and terrorism-- because a stealth muslim terrorist overthrew our government through a fraudulent election-- will prove to have been crazy.
If all goes really well, I’ll wake up one day and find that the last eight years have been a bad dream and that nobody ever took power by fraudulent means, dragged us into a war by fraudulent means, trampled all over the constitution, and was generally lawless and incompetent. Oh, and wrecked our economy.Posted by MisterC on 10/17 at 08:18 PM
If all goes well, in November many of us on this here blog will be receiving 3 a.m. text messages inviting us to join the Stealth Agenda transition team. I, for one, am ready.Posted by on 10/17 at 08:54 PM
If all goes well I can keep ignoring TPM Café.Posted by on 10/17 at 09:29 PM
If all goes well in November? I only vaguely remember what things going well is like. If the spiral from bad to worse stops in November, the hair I keep pulling out may begin to grow back.Posted by on 10/17 at 09:36 PM
if all goes well I will get to hate a Democratic president for four years, which would be a nice break in the routine.Posted by Chris Clarke on 10/17 at 09:40 PM
If all goes well, i will be able to hope some things will get a tiny bit better. Then again, my friends in Australia are really hoping i keep my own advice: that if all doesn’t go well, i will move down under.Posted by on 10/17 at 10:04 PM
I resent that, sir! I did visit you at tpmcafe.
But, if all goes well, April will keep the title of ‘cruelest month’, and November will be all turkey legs and pie and coffee and football and happy leftover halloween candy times.
However, I am still saddened by the ticket that could have been. Obama - Bérubé just sounds good. It sounds like a cute yet plucky South American marsupial, or maybe a little chocolate thing that they leave on your hotel pillow in Norway. If only you had added ‘Hockey Dad’ and ‘Miskatonic Pork Rind Eating Champion of nineteen-ought-two’ to your resume as we suggested!Posted by on 10/17 at 10:06 PM
Houston police confirm that one of the black-clad castrati suicides found in Haliburton’s home office was Dick Cheney.
I mean, that’d be a good day in November; I can fill up the other 28 if you’d like.Posted by Doghouse Riley on 10/17 at 10:17 PM
Trolls are so smelly. Kind of like finding shit on your shoe.Posted by Hattie on 10/17 at 11:19 PM
For what it’s worth, Michael, I did try to read that TPM thread. But I had to stop because I was worried about my eye. My doctor says I’m not supposed to get pudding in it.Posted by Chris Clarke on 10/17 at 11:29 PM
If all goes well, in November I shall no longer have a gallbladder full of pesky gallstones, and I’ll be able to eat whatever unhealthy delicious fatty food I damn well like. And since I’ll be off work for a week or two, in consequence of no longer having the aforementioned gallbladder, I may well get myself up at four in the morning to watch you lot elect your first black President (and give the finger to the Republicans in both Houses) in a mammoth landslide victory. Whilst eating a ton of fried leftover sacrificial chicken, to simultaneously celebrate both events. It’ll be like 1997 all over again. (Oh yes, I was still up for Portillo. Sweet memories.)Posted by on 10/18 at 04:48 AM
"If all goes well” Michael will continue this blog after November…Posted by wolfgang on 10/18 at 05:56 AM
"If all goes well”...I can surgically remove my
memory of reading that TPMcafe thread, which
i just wasted an hour reading.
Is that a false syllogism or flawed syllogism?Posted by on 10/18 at 08:11 AM
If all goes well, we’ll have at least five whole hours before the Republicans and the national media will notice that the Republicans have been completely rejected, and start calling for the resumption of bipartisanship and representation of the minority party in all policy decisions.
Oh, wait. That’s already started.
Well, then - if all goes well, we’ll have a day or two before the right-wing media notices that the Democrats have started fighting back, and decides that there’s been too much negativity in the political discourse of the ...
OK, I got it: If all goes well, Obama will win the election by such a wide margin that no one can dispute the legitimacy of his election and…
I give up. If all goes well I’m getting drunk on November 5.Posted by on 10/18 at 12:44 PM
"If all goes well”… I’ll be able to throw away all this duct tape. I need the space.Posted by on 10/18 at 01:14 PM
Chris Clarke, hi. Surely if all goes well, you’ll be able to hate a Democratic president for eight years?Posted by on 10/18 at 02:40 PM
If all goes well, people like Douglas Feith and John Bolton and Karl Rove and Alberto Gonzalez and Condi Rice and Dick Cheney and, oh crap, the list is so long, but if all goes well, maybe the prosecutions will finally start and they will be hounded for their sins for the rest of their natural living days.Posted by sfmike on 10/18 at 07:16 PM
Actually, the day after the election, I’m taking a group of 14 students to the Prague International Lesbian and Gay Film Festival. If all goes well, meaning Obama is elected, I’m bringing them back 8 days later. Otherwise, the 15 of us may just stay overseas for good.Posted by on 10/18 at 07:38 PM
If all goes well, my sanctuary church will let Bullwinkle know he’s in the clear now. Then my Lesbian Muslim Socialists prayer group will ramp up its recruitment of Junior Miss contestants in time for the Honkie Lynching Season. Afterwards, we’ll take away all of Dick Cheney’s guns and surrender the country to Bin Laden as the only fitting punishment he deserves.Posted by Kevin Hayden on 10/18 at 08:53 PM
- Posted by on 10/18 at 10:10 PM
If all goes well, Penn State fans will appreciate that they have a really good football team, enjoy the beat down they just put on the Wolverines, and quit whining about the referees. Also, if all goes well, they’ll win the rest of their games, especially next week.
Oh, yeah, and if all goes well, we can start working on undoing the damage of the last eight years at the federal level.Posted by on 10/18 at 10:11 PM
If all goes well, Justin Timberlake can cry Joe PGA-Tour-Winner a river next year.Posted by The Constructivist on 10/19 at 02:25 AM
hey your blob is nice written..
am new to blogging help me…
visit minePosted by on 10/19 at 08:19 AM
Puppethead: In Norway, we don’t leave chocolate on your pillows. We leave the blood of our conservative enemies. And little iPod shuffles with a complementary selection of our favourite recordings of the lamentation of their women as we drove them before us after crushing them.Posted by Martin G. on 10/19 at 11:51 AM
if all goes well then those mysterious intelligent and thoughtful conservatives you always talk about will also have voted for Obama and will thus prove they actually exist...oh wait, this IS already happening ...Posted by on 10/19 at 12:11 PM
If all goes well on my birthday, November 4th, I will pop open that bottle of Veuve Cliquot I’m saving up to celebrate the victory of a president who can speak in complete sentences all by himself; the defeat of Prop 8 in California; the replacement of Norm Coleman by Al Franken and Michele Bachmann by El Tinklenberg; and a veto-proof majority in the Senate. I will party all the way to the inauguration, and the I’ll get back to work on making sure the O-man and the Dems remember why we didn’t send a Clinton back to the White House.Posted by Joanna on 10/19 at 05:41 PM
Dear Martin G,
That sounds like my kind of vacation! I’m signing up for a cruise to Norway right NOW!Posted by on 10/19 at 08:11 PM
If all goes well, the partner and I will be in Albuquerque this Thursday. Enjoy the steel-blue fall skies, Michael. That means get out of the convention center…Posted by Doc Mara on 10/19 at 08:15 PM
If all goes well, I will be retiring these livejournal icons:
and wondering what to use instead.Posted by Doctor Science on 10/19 at 08:40 PM
A LA # 42 Above:
Hey Michael, your BLOB is nicely written!Posted by KMTBERRY on 10/19 at 09:28 PM
Blob is short for web-lob, a place where people toss around the ol’ content.Posted by on 10/19 at 10:40 PM
In Soviet Russia, pillows leave chocolate on YOU!
Ha! Ha!Posted by on 10/20 at 12:01 AM
If all goes well, 16 years of listening to Presidents speak in southern accents will be over. Wait, I guess that’ll happen either way.
Eh hem...If all goes well, the IL license plate will no longer read “Land of Lincoln” only....Posted by on 10/20 at 12:14 AM
If all goes well, the devil’s bargain I made in 2004 for the Sox to win the series will be reversed/redeemed; this time the Rays go to the series and we get a Democrat in the White House.
And yes, lives were lost, economies ruined, civil liberties abridged, another four years of carbon emissions freely and ebulliently emitted… the list goes on and on. It was totally worth it.Posted by on 10/20 at 12:47 AM
If all goes well, I’ll be able to unsubscribe from TPM Cafe and will no longer feel obligated to go hang out there, bored to tears, looking around for you every couple days. Sitting by the door, looking up every time it opens, disappointed with the competent but flat prose of the writers, hoping beyond hope that you would walk in and bathe us in your light.Posted by on 10/20 at 06:54 AM
If all goes well, I hope there won’t be any gloating. Just a clear unambiguous sense that we may have pulled ourselves out of the ditch and may be back on the road. I hope that America again restores it’s world leadership but in non-violent and mutually beneficial way for all the citizens of the planet. These high minded thoughts not withstanding, I hope that something like the fairness doctrine is implemented and Rush Limbaugh and friends on conservative radio are reduced to the level of irrelevance they so richly deserve.
ePosted by on 10/20 at 10:57 AM
Whew! Back in town after a 14-hour slog from Albuquerque to Dulles to Harrisburg and driving from there. Thanks for all these good wishes, everyone, and my apologies to anyone who actually read that TPM Cafe thread. I looked at it again myself over the weekend and couldn’t believe I stayed in it that long. But I have to say, JP @ 54, that I think the Cafe has an amazing lineup of contributors—and here’s to Reed Hundt for chasing erstwhile TPMer Larry Johnson back to No Quarter for once and for all. Me, I was just the comic relief over there.Posted by Michael on 10/20 at 11:21 AM
(Good wishes, Professor. And, uh, what TPM cafe thread?)
So: for this ABFF, what else are you looking forward to in November?
If all goes well, I (tend to) look forward to the birth of mdslet the First in November (or early December, if he’s a procrastinator like one of his parental units). Wow, this was perhaps the most personally relevant ABFF in living memory, and I missed it until the thread was cold and grey. No, no omens there or anything. Well, except possibly about the procrastinator bit.Posted by on 10/23 at 12:22 AM
Mazel tov, mds, on the incipient mdslet! And it’s never too late to comment on an ABFF thread—that’s part of the Aness of it all!Posted by Michael on 10/23 at 08:56 AM
Heheheheh… You said “Aness.” Er, I mean, thank you, Professor.
And we’d call mdslet “Michael,” except there are technical difficulties with that. Perhaps we can go with “Bérubéman” instead.Posted by on 10/23 at 09:51 AM
Interesting article. I love itPosted by Craft Shows North Carolina on 12/05 at 01:15 AM