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ABF Friday:  Take Five!

It’s the Joe the Plumber Tour!  Just in time for Halloween!  Hey—if your kid isn’t dressing up as Joe the Plumber next week, why not?  Does he (or she!) hate America?

Many of you may not understand what the Joe the Plumber Tour is all about.  It’s all about fighting al-Obama-style Islamic socialism, sure, but to understand the full import of the Tour, you really have to watch the full Joe the Plumber episode, which I didn’t do until I caught it yesterday at Ta-Nehisi Coates’s place:

Shame to say, I hadn’t heard Obama’s reply to this guy in full, because I was already so tired of Joe the Plumber thirty minutes into the third debate that I just couldn’t bring myself to watch this clip.  But Holy.  Mother.  Of.  Moloch.  This is the comprehensive, honest, and respectful answer that Mr. Plumber then turned around and characterized as a “tap dance”?  Yeah, sure, everybody jumped all over the “Sammy Davis Jr.” part.  But it’s also worth noting the “I didn’t understand a single word he was saying to me” part, because that’s what really matters to most Republicans.

But this isn’t about poor Joe.  This is about McCain / Flailin’.

Because this is how the GOP is going to play out the endgame: kicking off a national tour dedicated to all those hardworking ordinary Americans who can’t understand a straight answer about why it makes sense to undo the Bush tax cuts for people making over $250K a year and bump them up from a 36 percent rate to a (gasp!) 39 on income over that threshold.  Yes, all you people who see a black politician giving an intelligent, straight-up answer to a question about taxes and who think ah, what’s all this tap dancing bullshit; all you people who hear “spread the wealth around” and think not (as Obama says) of how small businesses need to have customers who can afford their goods and services but of Marxist-Leninists nationalizing the means of production (as opposed to, say, the banking industry); and all you people—advisors, consultants, lobbyists—who see in Obama’s answer a string of four words that afford you a last-ditch opportunity for demagoguery and lying . . . dudes, this tour’s for you.

McCain / Flailin’: We Think You’re Really Stupid.  No, Really.  We Really Do. We Have Nothing But Contempt For You, Truly.  And We Think You’ll Believe Pretty Much Any Crap We Tell You.  Don’t Let Us Down, America!

And now for today’s ABF exercise.

Yes, there’s a presidential election of some kind going on.  But did you know that at the same time, there are lots of other elections going on simultaneously at the same time?  There’s just so much to keep track of, and so many vile and vicious people in public office!  It’s a tribute to this great democracy of ours.

So, dear readers, which among these vile and vicious people would you most like to retire from public life forever, and assign to the task of rebuilding U.S. infrastructure, preferably in horizontally-striped black-and-white clothing in the hot sun?  I’m going to pick five, but you can do more or less if you like.  That too is a tribute to this great democracy of ours!

5.  Rep. Michele Bachmann: It’s so great that this woman, about whom I’ve been reading at PZ’s Pad since she was a state senator, is finally getting the national attention she deserves.  We can put her to work building “pro-America” high-speed railroads. 

4.  Sen. Norm Coleman: Paul Wellstone, seven words.  By Grabthar’s Hammer, you shall be avenged.

3.  Sen. Mitch McConnell: For the children.  Think of the children.

2.  Rudy Giuliani: All right, yes, I know he’s not in public office and not running for anything (anymore).  But for this piece of work, as the culmination of a distinguished career of vileness and viciousness, Mayor Nosferatu deserves a lifetime achievement award.  And an especially heavy pickaxe.

1.  Sen. Saxby Chambliss: Because anyone with the name “Saxby” is probably in cahoots with bin Laden.  Max Cleland, Grabthar’s hammer, avenged, etc.

Oops, I missed Jean Schmidt.  I must have taken my eye off the ball

Posted by on 10/24 at 09:05 AM
  1. Hi Michael, thanks for this. Great post. Sorry for my Sokal-exasperation the other day. You have indeed been able to make a silk purse out of the sow’s ear of the Science Wars.

    I’d actually like to nominate Sen. Mary “who needs habeus corpus anyway?” Landrieu, but would you believe it, her opponent is even worse! What’s an al-Obama supporter to do?

    So I’ll go for #2, as it will be great fun watching wingnut heads explode as Al Franken is sworn in on the floor of the US Senate. Word is that he will take the oath on the Library of Congress volume of this book.

    Captcha: “without” as in “feathers.”

    Posted by John "Hussein" Protevi  on  10/24  at  11:04 AM
  2. Mitch.

    #1 on my list.

    Yesterday’s Lexington Herald-Leader; 4-column headline:
    Race for U.S. Senate looks too close to call

    It’s not “drop everything and go to Ohio,” but this race could push the Dems to 60 in the Senate—with the added bonus of destroying the Republican leadership.  Actually, if we get this, we might even Lieberman-proof the Senate.  A huge race, and one the DSCC didn’t invest in until late.

    http://www.bruce2008.com/index.asp

    Yeah, I’d like to see Mitch breaking rocks.  But I’d settle for seeing him abandon his notional residence in Louisville and just go away.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  11:11 AM
  3. You are now anti-American if you think you’re better than Joe the Plumber:

    http://www.politico.com/blogs/bensmith/1008/Fake_America_located.html?showall

    The subtext has graduated to...what do you call what’s above the subtext? Ah yes, the text.

    Posted by Dave Lartigue  on  10/24  at  11:13 AM
  4. Oh, man, what a smorgasbord of choices. let’s see, as a current resident of Jean Schmidt’s southern OH district who had just moved to MN when Wellstone’s plane crashed and who left MN not long after Bachmann was elected, I must suggest that these three (plus McConnell) be condemned to perform Samuel Beckett’s Endgame, with the roles assigned thusly: Hamm (Coleman, although Hamm might be a wee bit noble for him), Clov (Bachmann), Nagg (McConnell) and Nell (Schmidt). For all eternity (http://samuel-beckett.net/endgame.html):

    HAMM:
    I feel a little too far to the left.
    (Clov moves chair slightly.)
    Now I feel a little too far to the right.
    (Clov moves chair slightly.)
    I feel a little too far forward.
    (Clov moves chair slightly.)
    Now I feel a little too far back.
    (Clov moves chair slightly.)
    Don’t stay there.
    (i.e. behind the chair)
    you give me the shivers.
    (Clov returns to his place beside the chair.)
    CLOV:
    If I could kill him I’d die happy.
    (Pause.)

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  11:15 AM
  5. Governor Matt Blunt of Missouri.  For this, among other reasons.

    Posted by Lance  on  10/24  at  11:17 AM
  6. but…

    The visual meme of the clip is “working class white guy dissed by elitist black intellectual”. Now for some people the simple math of taxation is not that complex but Joe is thinking “Crap I wanted to get that 28 footer instead of the 24 footer and this n****r is going to take my money and give it to his drug dealing welfare buddies”.

    As to the simple math. If Joe’s business nets 300K per year he winds up paying $1500 more under Obama’s plan. (39% vs. 36% on the marginal earnings over 250K)

    Maybe Obama should have done the actual calculation for him instead of assuming he could do the math.

    e.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  11:26 AM
  7. Rep. Tom ”The Rookie” Feeney (R-FL).

    Bonus material.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  11:30 AM
  8. Maybe Obama should have done the actual calculation for him instead of assuming he could do the math.

    Maybe.  But having (finally) seen the whole clip, I think Obama went above and beyond in spelling it out for him.  The only thing he could’ve done better was to make it clear that the higher tax rate pertains only to profits of 250K or more, not “revenues.” Seriously, I understand the semiotics you’re talking about, but to my professorial eye, this exchange looked like a student asking a misguided question and a teacher replying in considerable detail.  After which the student then goes off and tells people all about the Librul Bias of the Dangerous Professor.

    Governor Matt Blunt of Missouri.  For this, among other reasons.

    Oh, that is indeed vicious and vile.  For that we assign Blunt to exceptionally hard rock-breakin’ labor and then leave him to rot on the side of the road.  No health care for this one.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  11:39 AM
  9. It’s sad, but I have to agree with McCain / Palin on one thing.  After eight years of Bush, I too think that the American public is stupid, and that they’ll believe anything.  They’re only voting for a black guy now because the economy is finally collapsing so badly that they can’t ignore it.  It won’t matter whether Obama becomes the most successful President since FDR; soon enough they’ll be talking about elitists and how Jeb Bush is a guy they’d like to have a beer with.

    Therefore, I’m going to do my own, different list.  Who would I most like to see shipped off to a European war crimes trial before the American public returns to its lack of senses?

    1.  George W. Bush.  Breaking rocks is cruel and unusual punishment; let him sit in a humane cell somewhere writing his memoirs.  With his own pen and no ghostwriter.

    2. Cheney.  Heart condition prevents physical labor; perhaps he can be wired into more and more life-preserving devices and finally misfiled as an immortal brain somewhere a la Harlan Ellison’s “I Have No Mouth, But I Must Scream”.

    3. Powell.  “Mr. Powell, thank you for your endorsement of me as President.  I promised you a role in my administration.  Now just get on this jet and it will take you to the Hague as ... special representative.”

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  11:41 AM
  10. Nice.  Two Minnesotans on the list.  I am so ashamed.  I have elsewhere expressed my belief that legislation should be enacted immediately that requires that the words “the odious” precede any mention of Norm Coleman, as in, “Today the odious Sen. Norm Coleman denied that his support of a proposal to redirect Social Security funds to the stock market showed that he believes Social Security should be privatized.” Because Coleman is in office only because Wellstone died, he gets my vote.

    Also, Bachmann would be completely useless as a rock breaker.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  11:42 AM
  11. Homophobe Marilyn Musgrave, who thinks same-sex marriage is the most important threat we face in this country.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  11:43 AM
  12. I know this is not really a Grateful Dead kinda blog but no discussion of rock breaking is complete without mentiong Easy Wind:

    I been ballin’ a shiny black steel jack-hammer
    Been chippin’ up rocks for the great highway
    Live five years if I take my time
    Ballin’ that jack and a drinkin’ my wine.

    I been chippin’ them rocks from dawn till doom
    While my rider hide my bottle in the other room
    Doctor say I better stop ballin’ that jack
    If I live five years gonna bust my back, yes I will

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  11:51 AM
  13. Yeah, Musgrave almost made my list too.  Thanks, Mr. McCain!  And while Bachmann would be useless as a rock breaker, her scary, no-blink, pupil-less stare could be useful in motivating the other retired politicians to work even harder.

    John Hussein @ 1:  thanks for the kind word, but really, I learned a great deal as a result of the Science Wars.  It was (and is) kinda fun.  And what to do if you’re an al-Obama supporter faced with the Louisiana senate race?  Hey, now’s the time to write in Pat Paulsen.  We could stand to lose Murtha here in PA, too.

    And Rich Puchalsky is a complete and total elitist.  I bet he lives in one of those anti-American cities like New York or Washington, DC.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  11:51 AM
  14. misses palin!
    i want to fly into ur Airspase!
    misses palin!
    i want to reer my little Head!
    misses palin!
    why wont You reply to my Emails?!!
    I made a teliscop for YOU and i luv u so

    (via Making Light)

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  12:04 PM
  15. I’m thinking Ted Stevens walks away a free man, which is too bad-- it’d be cool if one of the Senate Republicans running for re-election really did end up in stir.

    Posted by Bill Altreuter  on  10/24  at  12:04 PM
  16. We can eliminate only one? I see your game.

    Exactly how did you get hold of the supersecret Diebold Voting Machine Manual and Power User Tricks (GOP Edition)?

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  12:08 PM
  17. "to my professorial eye”....

    Yeah exactly. How many pinko elitist professors from eastern schools that teach “liberal” arts do you think the McCain campaign is targeting as undecided voters?

    I still think this whole thing is a carefully constructed attempt by the GOP to appeal to deep sub-conscious racial prejudices in working class whites in OH, PA, etc.

    e.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  12:11 PM
  18. I nominate Coleman. Wellstone was my political hero, and that sequence of events from his death to Coleman taking office was even worse for me than the Supreme Court’s selection of Dubya.

    Posted by Jason B  on  10/24  at  12:33 PM
  19. Thanks, Edward...between you and me and spyder, we can make this a Grateful Dead kinda blog! And, uh, Socialist to boot!

    But as to the arbitrary matter at hand, Bachmann gets my vote as The Worst. Like Michael, my opinion is based on reading PZ Myers. Yikes!

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  12:45 PM
  20. Joe’s “I didn’t understand a single word he was saying to me” reminds me so much of the Interpreter in Harold and Kumar Escape or (forgive me for mentioning this again) Bisson’s “Tell Them They Are All Full of Shit and They Should Fuck Off.” It’s inconsistent with what he expected to hear from Sammy Davis Jr, is the problem.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  12:45 PM
  21. All politics is local, I suppose, and the two I want to get rid of are very local to me.  The first is Eric Cantor (what commands to link here?  oh well - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZACcB9kMZ2Y).

    The second you may not have heard of - he’s Jim Gilmore who is running against Mark Warner for John Warner’s (no relation) Senate seat.  Jim Gilmore won the governorship of Virginia eleven years ago by embracing the following strategy (I wish I was making this up):

    1. Identify the tax Virginians find most irritating
    2. Promise to eliminate it, if elected
    3. Don’t talk about anything - ANYTHING - else.

    Unfortunately, the most irritating tax in Virginia was the personal property tax on cars.  Which was a local, not a state tax (not to mention a progressive one).  So now the regressive state sales tax is redistributed to localities with richer localities getting more money because they’re giving up more by not taxing all those new mercedes.

    Gilmore also, just putting this out there, cornered my younger brother in the state house when brother was there to deliver some documents for his job in the treasury department.  Gilmore kept asking brother dearest where said brother dearest’s school group was until B.D. - still not recognizing the newly installed governor - said “I don’t need no school you fucking prick” and beat feet back to his job at the treasury.  There are so many American Dreams fulfilled in that moment, it just - it brings tears to my eyes, really it does.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  12:51 PM
  22. Jason B, you forgot to say “I nominate the odious Coleman.” I really am going to be insistent about this.

    captcha “thought” as in, “I thought Paul Wellstone was probably the most decent man ever to serve in the US Senate.”

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  01:08 PM
  23. Great idea! Physical rehabilitation of Modern Republican thought patterns may just work—perspiration overwhelming defensive bulwarks designed to turn back “dangerous” notions.

    In that spirit I’d like to see every instance of the debate “pivot”—changing subjects in the middle of a response to 1) avoid answering an uncomfortable question, and 2) insert yet another talking point—punished with an automatic 30 day invitation to a correctional spa featuring remedial rock reduction. Callouses for Congress.

    Posted by black dog buzzkill  on  10/24  at  01:09 PM
  24. Newt Gingrich. Sure, he’s not in office now, but he’s always threatening comebacks. And so much of this can be laid directly or indirectly at his feet.

    Captcha: remember. As in always remember, and never forget, what these bastards have done in the last 28 years.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  01:09 PM
  25. Oh, also, in hopes of an end to the United States’ failed policy toward Cuba, I’d like to add both Díaz Balart brothers to my Florida wish list.  I’d like to include Rep. Ros-Lehtinen as well, but I’m afraid she, unlike the brothers, is pretty secure in her seat, as she is not insane on domestic issues and has a reputation of being very good on constituent services.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  01:21 PM
  26. What about that Robin Hayes feller from NC who talked about how all us librules hate American and hard-working religious peoples?

    And while I realize it’s late in the campaign, can you try to arrange an interview with Sarah Palin? I just get all little starbursts whenever I sees her on the screen.

    Posted by Bulworth  on  10/24  at  01:33 PM
  27. I know this isn’t strictly, um, responsive to the prompt, but re elites I hafta ask about:

    “I know what a lot of these elitists are. The ones that she never went to a cocktail party with in Georgetown. I’ll be very frank with you. Who think that they can dictate what they believe to America rather than let Americans decide for themselves.”

    The cocktails bit hangs me up.  Do cocktail parties still exist?  Or is this Zizek’s point ("never went") that you imagine other people having the pleasure you’re not getting?  And then the quick turn from “cocktails” to “dictate”—it’s like going from Bertie Wooster to Nero. 

    captcha: “often” i.e. never.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  01:37 PM
  28. "McCain / Flailin’: We Think You’re Really Stupid.  No, Really.  We Really Do. We Have Nothing But Contempt For You, Truly.  And We Think You’ll Believe Pretty Much Any Crap We Tell You.  Don’t Let Us Down, America!”

    Michael, I was confused here for a moment as to whether you were channeling McCain’s contempt for us or expressing your own contempt for McCain.

    As for the question, here’s no way I could narrow my choices down to single digits.  I’m going to stick to rooting for a meteorite to hit Capitol Hill, while the House & Senate are in some kind of special, secret, no-janitors-allowed-in-the-building joint session, getting briefed perhaps on CIA destabilization operations in Iran.  That way I can choose the handful I’d rather be home with a cold that day, instead.  Much easier.

    Posted by Kalkin  on  10/24  at  02:45 PM
  29. I think it’s a little disingenuous to post that clip as the “full episode.” Joe The Plumber’s “tap-dance” dismissal makes much more sense when you view the unedited version, available here.
    (It also explains why Mr. The Plumber didn’t understand al-Obama’s answer--he was probably trying to read the subtitles.)

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  03:05 PM
  30. I was gonna mention Robin Hayes, who is North Carolina’s version of Michelle Bachman.  We may also send Sen. Elizabeth Dole off into retirement.

    Both those seats are likely to flip to Democrat.  Fingers crossed.  On the pessimistic side, our governor’s mansion is likely to flip from D to R.

    Posted by jbj  on  10/24  at  03:09 PM
  31. Sorry, Edward. I’m new to this requirement, but it makes perfect sense. The odious Norm Coleman deserves no better. In fact, I think it should be a further requirement that when one sees his name in print or hears it spoken without that adjective that one is duty-bound to provide it verbally.

    Which could lead to hundreds of thousands of Minnesotans speaking “The odious” as they look at their ballots on November 4.

    I’d also like to get (the odious) his name changed to “Theodeus.” That would be funny.

    Posted by Jason B  on  10/24  at  03:10 PM
  32. Theodeus.  I like it!

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  03:13 PM
  33. Sorry, I can’t find a source for Joe the Plumber saying “I couldn’t understand a single word he was saying to me.” I’m not trolling here, I’m genuinely a bit skeptical that he actually said that, because it seems so clear what Obama was trying to say, and if he claims he couldn’t understand it, he must be seriously stupid.  When/where did he say that?

    Posted by M. Gordon  on  10/24  at  03:20 PM
  34. I will have to go with Bachmann, although I too have dreams about watching Al Franken do Stuart Smalley bits on the Senate floor.  I was watching “live” when Bachmann did her McCarthy impersonation on Matthews’ show--I thought at the time it was just another moment of the unhinged right, albeit a particularly disturbing one.  Who knew people would actually pick out her crazy sh*t amongst all the other crazy sh*t and start donating money to her opponent?  Has anyone seen if this has happened for Kissell?

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  03:46 PM
  35. It’s hard for me to decide on my # hate. Schwarzenegger is big on my list for making the people of my home state look like idiots.
    He has done great damage to our (capcha) image.

    Posted by Hattie  on  10/24  at  04:28 PM
  36. That’s #1, of course. Jeez, I’m getting dopey. Must be the California gas wafting over here.

    Posted by Hattie  on  10/24  at  04:30 PM
  37. “McCain / Flailin’: We Think You’re Really Stupid.  No, Really.  We Really Do. We Have Nothing But Contempt For You, Truly.  And We Think You’ll Believe Pretty Much Any Crap We Tell You.  Don’t Let Us Down, America!”

    Michael, I was confused here for a moment as to whether you were channeling McCain’s contempt for us or expressing your own contempt for McCain.

    Hi, Kalkin!  The correct answer is (a).  It’s the new official slogan of the Joe the Plumber Tour.

    Sorry, I can’t find a source for Joe the Plumber saying “I couldn’t understand a single word he was saying to me.” I’m not trolling here, I’m genuinely a bit skeptical that he actually said that

    Sorry about that, M. Gordon.  I should have marked this paraphrase like so:  ”Shorter Joe the Plumber: I couldn’t understand a single word he was saying to me.” That way I would have demonstrated more clearly that I am aware of all Internet traditions.

    Captcha:  Soviet, no doubt a reference to that 39 percent tax bracket.

    Posted by Michael  on  10/24  at  05:16 PM
  38. Please add the deliteful Marsha Blackburn to your list. Making middle Tennessee feel more like North Mississippi everyday.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  05:22 PM
  39. Chambliss earned his #1 ranking.  Not only is he completely without principle, he’s petty in every way. 

    He called the FBI on an Atlanta punk band who’d named themselves Saxby Chambliss while he was in the House as part of Newt’s Class of 1994.  The kids said that when the FBI came to see them and suggested that the newly elevated senator might not like them using his name, they figured they’d better drop it or else. 

    Now if I can steel myself to muck out the Creative Loafing archives for those stories I read about that.  The task seems Herculean.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  06:23 PM
  40. Ronald Reagan

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  06:40 PM
  41. TOM DELAY?!?!?!?!?

    JACK ABRAMOF?!?!?!?!?

    THAT GOD-DAMNED JOHN CORNYN!!!!

    W!!!!!

    I could go on ALL DAY LONG!!!

    Honestly, MOST of these people are actually GUILTY of crimes, for REALS

    I am kind of hoping that the Obama Admin slaps a few of them into stir.

    I personally would like to see W, Cheney, Delay, Rove, and a few assorted others SWING BY THE NECK UNTIL DEAD for TREASON, in outing Valerie Plame, which actually WAS TREASON. ACTIONABLE TREASON PEOPLE

    Captcha: THrough, as in (you guessed it) WE ARE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS HERE PEOPLE

    Posted by KMTBERRY  on  10/24  at  08:50 PM
  42. I left Minnesota in 2005. Between the time The Odious Norm was elected and the time I moved, I wrote The Odious Norm an average of once a month to say, “What the hell are you thinking supporting / voting against [fill in appalling vote here]? When you were a law student, you were a reasonable, liberal person protesting the Vietnam War. What happened? Did you suffer a head injury? And if so, why are you against universal health care? Liberals want to help you!”

    Although The Odious Norm was my long-term ongoing (and frustrating) project, he did agree with me once: on keeping the drills out of the ANWR. On the other hand, Michelle “I was led astray by Tweety” Bachmann was my Representative, and she and I never agreed on anything at all. I really can’t decide between them, and I don’t know any others whom I would prefer to see cultivating new, harmless hobbies starting November 5.

    Can you see why I had to flee?

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  09:20 PM
  43. Well, as long as you’re taking nominations, it’d be wonderful if we Oklahomans could rid ourselves of Jim Inhofe.  Sadly, I’m doubtful of that happening, but I can dream.  Your list is good too, though.

    Posted by  on  10/24  at  10:46 PM
  44. "He called the FBI on an Atlanta punk band who’d named themselves Saxby Chambliss while he was in the House as part of Newt’s Class of 1994.”

    see, ya gotta change the name slightly--"Sexxy Chambliss” would’ve worked just fine!

    Remember “Dick Army”?  But the Wikipedia entry just redirects you to one Richard Keith “Dick” Armey...what’s up with that?

    Posted by  on  10/25  at  02:16 AM
  45. We over here on the western side of the Rocky Mountains have our nominees as well.  For starters i would like to put up the name of Senator Gordon “there is not an agribusiness in this country that doesn’t owe me, oops i tried to say own me?” Smith of Oregon.  Next would be Rep. Dave Reichert of the 8th District of Washington, quickly followed by Doc Hastings.  Hastings is particularly odious in that as Chair of the House Ethics Committee (until 2006) he could find not a single ethically challenged Republican in the House of Representatives (those ethically unchallenged included DeLay, Ney, Hastert, Foley, Doolittle, Pombo, et al).  Doc Hastings has less sense than a tree, any tree.

    Posted by  on  10/25  at  05:07 AM
  46. Actually I will suggest Joe the Plumber himself. Right now the top *3* stories in the politics section of the FoxNews website are about the man.
    One links to an unintentionally hilarious piece in the Moonie Times headlined “Joe ‘scared for America’ after talking to Obama”. In it we learn that

    Joe the Plumber all but came out of the water closet for Sen. John McCain on Friday, saying that his famous exchange with Sen. Barack Obama made him “scared for America” and that he doesn’t trust the Democratic presidential candidate on taxes.

    Don’t rush your final decision Joe, decidin’ is hard work.

    (I was at the site because I was interested in what manner of mea culpa they’d have on their reporting on the “carved B” attack. Shockingly there was only a straightforward recounting of the facts by the always fair and balanced Carl Cameron.)

    Posted by  on  10/25  at  07:46 AM
  47. It is now established fact that Hussein al-Obama is not constitutionally eligible to become the U.S. president and indeed is an illegal immigrant who should be deported.
    Furthermore I suspected all along that he is in fact an ex-Nazi, who disguised himself as a communist to escape the Mossad before he was born in Africa…

    Posted by wolfgang  on  10/25  at  07:57 AM
  48. I’m looking back but mostly looking forward with respect to Khmer Rouge-like Public Works Human Resource Management.

    Looking back:

    Dick Cheney. What do you say? A one-man Constitutional wrecking crew. To characterize him as a blood-drinking monster is to do violence to the legacy of Vlad the Impaler.

    Now, let’s be forward-thinking. We need to decapitate the GOP.

    1. Sarah Palin. The incandescent white dwarf in the Republican solar system encapsulates my lack of trust in my fellow-Americans. In my heart of hearts, I fear we are dumb enough to elect her President of the US come 2012. (In fact, her ads/infomercials have already begun on Fox. I saw a campaign ad by a 527 featuring her and her alone yesterday.)

    2. Bobby Jindal. If genius is the ability to see connections no one else sees, then his merging of Tom Friedman’s hypercapitalist view of a global flat earth with a pre-Medieval Catholic view of an actual flat earth, marks Jindal as a genius.

    3. Haley Barbour. Only thanks to his comparative youth and energy can he maintain a drawlin’ back-slappin’ scotch-drinkin’ folksiness to mask his real face as Cheney’s true heir. If we are lucky, he will also inherit Cheney’s true heart (and attendant circulatory system). The consummate Washington insider, this former lobbyist and RNC chief exploited the tragedy of Katrina with an aw-shucks cynicism only matched by Mayer Nosferatu’s shameless scaling of the Ground Zero rubble.

    4. Mike Huckabee. In spite of his recent makeover from hard-right culture-warrior to amiable Sunday School teacher, he remains a cynical and vicious reactionary. His release of a rapist-murderer that right-wing nutters were convinced had been falsely imprisoned through the Awesome Power of the Clenis and said murderer’s predictable reoffending proves that the Culture of Life’s cant ends where Mike Huckabee’s ambitions begin. As a grace note, at the end of his governorship, he presided over the literal sledgehammering of computer hard-drives from his office. Apparently Huck didn’t trust the high-falutin’ computer experts to adequately purge the digital fingerprints of his misdeeds.

    Extremism in defense against the next Bush Administration is no vice. And think how many bridges we can get built.

    Posted by  on  10/25  at  11:51 AM
  49. I watched the entire exchange with Joe the moron too, and as Obama clearly carefully explained his position to this dimwitted liar I thought he might as well be explaining it to a cow chewing its cud in the field.

    Posted by  on  10/25  at  12:18 PM
  50. At least the cow would have the good sense not to run for Congress in an overwhelmingly Democratic district with a popular incumbent.

    And nobody’s mentioned John Shadegg yet?  I don’t have many readers in Arizona, I guess.

    Posted by Michael  on  10/25  at  02:17 PM
  51. I am so glad I get to vote personally to retire Norm Coleman, but I’m not in Michele Bachmann’s district so I can’t vote for Elwin Tinklenberg, her opponent, who is, like Franken, someone who will represent us well.

    If you’ll permit, this is a tribute from the website of Wellstone Action:
    “Saturday, October 25th marks the 6th anniversary of the plane crash that took the lives of Paul and Sheila Wellstone, Marcia Wellstone Markuson, Mary McEvoy, Tom Lapic, and Will McLaughlin.  We pause to remember these six wonderful and talented individuals and to hold them in our hearts.

    We remember their passion for social justice and their commitment to transforming our world for the common good. We dedicate our work to their memory, knowing that they would be proud of all that we collectively have accomplished.”

    I think one future story will be how many alums of Camp Wellstone have run for office, been elected or become important in the grass-roots organizing effort for Obama. Their (and our) efforts will make this retirement wish-list a reality.

    Posted by  on  10/25  at  08:08 PM
  52. I don’t have many readers in Arizona, I guess.

    Perhaps the entire state needs to be nominated.  Of the entire Congressional delegation only one Democrat is to the left of, well, center, i guess.  And the fact that Maricopa Sheriff Joe Arpaio gets reelected by overwhelming majority, distills the nightmare of that state down to a mass of gooey wingnut insanity.  Although they do throw a rocking party down in Tucson that is well worth attending.

    Posted by  on  10/25  at  11:28 PM
  53. Doonesbury’s Sunday take on Joe the Plumber.

    Posted by  on  10/26  at  08:40 PM
  54. Michael, that clip is absolutely one of the things that has made me go from merely supporting our nominee to falling head over heels in love with the guy!  Someone comes up and disagrees with him - someone, moreover, who will probably NEVER agree with him - and Obama calmly and crisply and respectfully argues his point.  Wow.  After so many years of “Bubble Bush,” it is unbelievably refreshing to see a leader who can actually deal with someone who has the temerity to express a differing opinion.  I dunno, maybe my standards have become too low, but I predict BIG things for young Mr. Obama.

    Posted by tikistitch  on  10/28  at  07:19 PM

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