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Mister Answer Man Answered

American Airspace regrets to announce that Mister Answer Man’s contract will not be renewed for 2010.  We appreciate his long and distinguished service to this blog and his once-formidable skills as a Super Bowl prognosticator.  We wish him well in his future endeavors, wherever they may take him.

American Airspace will continue to reach out to guest bloggers to provide predictions and commentary on major sports events.  For the Stanley Cup playoffs, we are currently in negotiations with Guy Lafleur and Theo Fleury.

Posted by on 02/08 at 11:45 AM
  1. Well, that’s a fine how-do-you do for a simple factual error in projection, or maybe should we say a failure to attain projection verification. I guess that the contract-renewal process at American Airspace does not require incommensurability to justify termination. You don’t have to be irrational, just wrong?

    Fortunately, historians tend to be able to predict the past with reasonable accuracy, and I therefore hope that some historian will be able to contribute commentary in this esteemed ... what would you call it? ... idiom! for the foreseeable future.

    But I must confess an error of omission: Less than 10 days ago, I walked by the Hockey Hall of Fame (poor translation to English) and did not enter. Asserted mitigating factor: I spent that weekend learning from James Turk, Gary Rhoades, and other esteemed staff and members of either CAUT or AAUP.

    Posted by Sherman Dorn  on  02/08  at  02:07 PM
  2. As has been observed, prediction is hard, especially about the future.

    So, how ‘bout Pete and Roger?  I thought they were better than the Stones, worse than Prince.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  02:11 PM
  3. I predict that by the time school is out President BHO will sign a comprehensive national health care bill that includes the essence of a public option, probably with a different name. This bill will have strong bipartisan support.

    The latest White House strategy, while superficially yet another example of Democratic negotiation by capitulation (or is that capitulation by negotiation?), looks to be a feint, a hook and go leaving the GOP yelling a flat-footed “Tort reform!!!!” while the nation streaks down field. By the time they realize the switch their only plausible response will be to raise their arms in celebration, claiming they were blocking for health reform, not against it.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  02:16 PM
  4. I was gonna say that that fleur-de-lis looks awful pointy and sharp, and therefore perhaps kinda scary and fierce. But I was rooting for the Colts, especially after witnessing the Saints’ cripple-the-old-guy-by-getting-away-with-late-hits strategy in the Vikings game.

    Or perhaps the karmic balance was tipped by the raging misogyny of the advertisements, which demonstrated the problems raised by advertising one’s manliness, and thus the Saints were rewarded for having enough confidence in their masculinity to wear the fleur-de-lis comfortably.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  02:43 PM
  5. Maybe have Richmond Flowers Jr. in to write about track and field, football and race.

    And does the following work in anyone’s browser?

    It is the html code for a fleur-de-lis (#9884), but it does not render as such in my browser.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  02:50 PM
  6. You know, if we pretend that the fleur-de-lis isn’t called a fleur-de-lis--let’s call it the skewered bird--then it is considerably more manly.  Since the important thing about the manliness of uniforms is the image and not the name, I think it is safe to say that Mr. Answer Man’s process is still unimpeachable, regardless of this slight oversight.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  03:43 PM
  7. JP, I see a turtle there. Maybe it’s supposed to be a fleur-de-lis. It’s really tiny, and at like +700% text size it starts to look definitely turtlish.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  03:45 PM
  8. I guess that the contract-renewal process at American Airspace does not require incommensurability to justify termination. You don’t have to be irrational, just wrong?

    At American Airspace it’s win or go home, baby.

    But I was rooting for the Colts, especially after witnessing the Saints’ cripple-the-old-guy-by-getting-away-with-late-hits strategy in the Vikings game.

    Hmm.  I’ll admit that the OT pass interference call on the Vikings was a travesty, but otherwise I don’t think the Saints caught any officiating breaks in that game.  This one, btw, was pretty amazingly error-free.  Very very few penalties, and I think there was only one turnover?  Not that it mattered to the outcome of the game or anything.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  04:00 PM
  9. Few realize that the fleur-de-lis is, in fact, a stylized turtle.

    Not even the shadowy figureheads of the House of Bourbon, whom I would like to welcome as our new planetary overlords. Novus ordo seclorum. The beer ads sucked because it’s beaujolais from here on out.

    As The Who might sing if any of them were still alive, “meet the new boss.”

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  05:17 PM
  10. the fleur-de-lis is, in fact, a stylized turtle.

    A skinny, trendy euro-turtle.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  05:27 PM
  11. Someone should do a flash or java program where the fleur-de-lis morphs in to a hand defiantly flipping the bird.

    The onside kick was amazing. The field goal kicker was clutch as was the 2pt conversion. Awesome game. The Saints just kept themselves in it until - bam! - interception and not enough time left on the clock, even for Manning.

    Posted by Pete  on  02/08  at  06:22 PM
  12. Perchance might there be a Mister Answer Man Jr. around who could respond to non-sports questions regarding various theoretical points about the present and past tenses?

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  06:53 PM
  13. Maybe Mister Answer Man can get a job hawking healthcare for the Obamites.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  08:13 PM
  14. When Mr. Answer Man goes down, he goes down hard. I also blew it—after the first quarter I figured the Saints’ cause was hopeless, and turned off the TV. Fortunately I TiVo’d it so I could enjoy that fantastic interception later.

    @JP Stormcrow: in Safari 4.04 on a Mac, I see a very, very, very, very tiny fleur-de-lis.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  08:19 PM
  15. American Airspace regrets to announce that Mister Answer Man’s contract will not be renewed for 2010.

    Mynd you, møøse bites Kan be pretty nasti…

    Someone should do a flash or java program where the fleur-de-lis morphs in to a hand defiantly flipping the bird.

    What do you mean “morphs”?  That’s what was wrong with asserting the supposed non-virility of the fleur-de-lis: I have to suppress a “Chicka-Wow Chicka-Wow Wow” every time.  I mean, look at it, people!  Pure digitus impudicus.

    NB: This is not meant to imply anything about JP Stormcrow.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  08:27 PM
  16. I have a belief that I’m not going to examine too closely (like, by trying to confirm it from any authoritative source), that the fleur-de-lis actually is believed by some to be a stylized frog.  So, not a turtle, but close.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  09:38 PM
  17. "So, how ‘bout Pete and Roger?  I thought they were better than the Stones, worse than Prince. “

    My perception exactly.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  10:32 PM
  18. Certainly not authoritative, but this question was asked at allexperts.com: I have been told that the French Fleur de Lis began as three frogs leaping.  The configuration was later simplified into the Fleur de Lis.  Is this true?

    Short answer: No. But apparently there is this legend of its origin:

    Clovis, the king of the Franks (circ. 500 A.D.) had three frogs on his coat of arms.  When fighting against the Goths near a river, he needed a ford for his army but did not find any. Suddenly, he saw a bunch of yellow iris, flowers which grow in a not deep water. At this place, his army crossed over the river, taking his enemies from the rear, and won. In remembrance, he decided to put three iris flowers on his coat of arms, in place of the three frogs.[childish emphasis added]

    With enemies like that, who needs friends.

    Posted by  on  02/08  at  11:53 PM
  19. Yeah, the Superbowl was amazingly error-free, except that the few that occurred mattered. Oh well, you can’t stay mad at New Orleans.

    On the Vikings game: I don’t think the Saints caught any officiating breaks in that game. You have your epistemology, I have mine.

    Posted by  on  02/09  at  12:24 AM
  20. three iris flowers on his coat of arms

    What?  You don’t believe me? Damn.

    Posted by  on  02/09  at  01:30 AM
  21. mds @ 15:  Pure digitus impudicus.

    I have a fwiend in Wome named Digitus Impudicus.

    rm @ 19:  You have your epistemology, I have mine.

    The playoffs are all about incommensurability.  Except when they’re not, of course.

    Posted by Michael  on  02/09  at  08:52 AM
  22. Michael @ 8:

    Deep in NO territory Favre gets hit below the knees by Bobby McCray on the interception to Vilma and severely sprains his ankle.  McCray gets fined $210k two days later for that hit and another one.  NFL Head of Officiating Mike Pereira goes on NFL Network and says a penalty should have been called (personal foul, 1st down Vikes at the 19).  Does any of that constitute evidence of an “officiating break”?

    Posted by  on  02/09  at  10:25 AM
  23. My Dear Professor Bérubé:

    Inspired by a recent encounter in these pages between yourself and a certain Ms. E. O’Connor, I address these comments to you because I am very concerned. Concerned about what, you may ask? I will explain. I am concerned that as 2nd Vice-President of the Modern Language Association you have not pointed out that the correct version of the chant popular among the supporters of the New Orleans Saints is “Who is that? Who is that? Who is that who says they are going to defeat the Saints?”

    In this time of shrinking public support for the study of the modern languages I find no alternative but you hold you personally responsible for all future budget cuts to higher education until you speak on this issue.

    Posted by Concerned Reader  on  02/09  at  11:05 AM
  24. (bangs on monitor) STUPID INTERNET! BE MORE FUNNY!

    Posted by  on  02/09  at  12:08 PM
  25. Dear Concerned Reader, if that is your real name:

    As a self-appointed member of the Professor’s goon squad, I take umbrage at your threats to the future of higher education.  If you have a problem with the charming patois of New Orleans, which embraced the Latin “Quo Datus” (Who [is] the given person") via Old French, I suggest you take it up with French professors in Louisiana.  They are a far more worthwhile target for your scorn.

    Posted by  on  02/09  at  02:23 PM
  26. Deep in NO territory Favre gets hit below the knees by Bobby McCray on the interception to Vilma and severely sprains his ankle.  McCray gets fined $210k two days later for that hit and another one.  NFL Head of Officiating Mike Pereira goes on NFL Network and says a penalty should have been called (personal foul, 1st down Vikes at the 19).  Does any of that constitute evidence of an “officiating break”?

    Yes, yes it does.  But then again, the Vikings would never have had that chance if not for the pretty lousy (at best, questionable) roughing-the-QB call on Hargrove earlier in the drive, when Favre threw incomplete on 3rd-and-5.

    Inspired by a recent encounter in these pages between yourself and a certain Ms. E. O’Connor, I address these comments to you because I am very concerned.

    You are right to be concerned, Concerned Reader—and I am confident that that is your real name.  But if you are trying to use “snark” in any way to mock Ms. O’Connor, I will have to refer you to the seventh comment of this thread, which makes it clear that she was victimized by that encounter, and not very happy about it, either.  So please, criticize the supporters of the New Orleans Saints all you like, but be civil.

    Posted by Michael  on  02/09  at  02:26 PM
  27. Now I am even more concerned, but now for Ms. E. O’Connor, for having been chided, nay, mocked even, mocked I say, on the Internet of all places, heretofore a bastion of civility before the Bérubéan hordes wrecked the place— and it wasn’t theirs to wreck! The Internet, after all, is a series of tubes that students can enter. Will no one here think of the students?

    French professors in Louisiana: what a useless bunch they are, having worked so long and hard to bring coals to Newcastle, as the saying goes.

    Speaking of sayings, I must rephrase my question: “Who essays a claim to be able to score more points in a professional football encounter than the Saints of New Orleans? Will they not have the civility to step forth and identify themselves?”

    Posted by Concerned Reader  on  02/09  at  03:24 PM
  28. This is for Sven, Edward, and others with an interest in the history of music.

    On an other note: Fwee Wodewick!

    2.11:  the captcha is “game,” but i am at a loss to use it in a sentence.

    Posted by  on  02/09  at  11:59 PM
  29. nelsonhaha.jpg

    Posted by  on  02/10  at  12:19 AM
  30. “Who essays a claim to be able to score more points in a professional football encounter than the Saints of New Orleans? Will they not have the civility to step forth and identify themselves?”

    Best. Sports. Chant. Ever!

    **BREAKING** - Mr. Answer Man’s true identity revealed by TMZ.COM:

    ralphwiggummusicbu4.jpg

    Posted by  on  02/10  at  12:38 AM
  31. Whatever, dude.

    Posted by  on  02/10  at  01:25 AM
  32. I’m always late to the party.  Here I am plowing through the thick volume on Mister Answer Man’s sex life by Jean-Baptiste Botul, and I come here to find he is no more.

    Posted by  on  02/10  at  01:43 PM
  33. Michael @ 26:

    Perhaps, but the NFL has made it a priority to protect quarterbacks, so the penalty isn’t all that surprising.  To my eyes it looked like a deliberate attempt to hurt Favre and worthy of a penalty.  It wasn’t an “I couldn’t stop my momentum” situation.  He picked up Favre and drove him into the ground.

    Posted by  on  02/10  at  02:42 PM
  34. Ah, here I disagree with you, Kurzleg—yes, the league protects its QBs better than it did back in the day, but in this case, Hargrove had Favre in his grasp just as Favre released the ball, and it was even worse than an inability-to-stop-momentum situation:  Hargrove had already begun the tackle.

    The McCray thing was different, I think.  On the one hand, McCray was rolling around on the carpet, not deliberately diving at Favre’s ankles; but on the other hand, in football as in hockey I take below-the-knee hits very seriously, as when Darcy Tucker basically tried to end Michael Peca’s career by submarining him a few seconds after he’d gotten rid of the puck.

    Posted by Michael  on  02/10  at  03:00 PM
  35. Here I am plowing through the thick volume on Mister Answer Man’s sex life by Jean-Baptiste Botul, and I come here to find he is no more.

    Your ideas are intriguing to me and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

    Posted by Bernard Henri-Lévy  on  02/10  at  03:34 PM
  36. I’m thinking this thread really calls for a musical fade out. Creedence “Born on the Bayou” seems about right.

    Posted by  on  02/10  at  04:38 PM
  37. I don’t understand all the fuss about M. Botul. His works have always struck me as insightful and well-founded.

    Posted by Mary Rosh  on  02/10  at  08:16 PM
  38. “Who essays a claim to be able to score more points in a professional football encounter than the Saints of New Orleans? Will they not have the civility to step forth and identify themselves?”

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tlkUyl3fjvs

    thanks for the link, spyder

    Posted by  on  02/10  at  11:26 PM

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