Home | Away

Two stories about Jamie

Story one:  As we came out of the gym where he and I swim on the weekends, Jamie decided to take his own gym pass off the front counter.  “You want to hold onto that?” I asked.  “Yes,” he said.  “It’s my card.” “Cool,” I replied, “but it might be easier if you put it in my wallet, so it won’t get lost.” Jamie, you see, likes putting things in his pockets—he likes getting a few bucks or a bunch of quarters for pinball—but he usually forgets about them before too long.  So he agreed, slipping his card into my wallet—and then taking my wallet.  “Well, sweetie,” I said, ”I’ll hold your card for you.  That’s the idea.”

“I can have a wallet,” Jamie replied.  “I’m a teenager.  I’m allowed.”

That snapped me to attention.  “Yes, you are allowed,” I said.  “And that sounds like a good idea, too.  But I need my wallet, you know—see, it has my credit cards.”

“I love credit cards,” Jamie shot back.  “Hey,” he added, finding his school ID tucked behind my AAA card, “that’s my card too.  Gimme my cards, Michael.”

So Janet got him a wallet this weekend, and he’s carrying it to school today for the first time.  In fact, he walked to the bus stop with his hand on his wallet pocket all the way.  With his mind on his wallet and his wallet on his mind.

Story two:  we were watching TV, doing nothing much, and I decided to tell him how good he’d been with the younger kids of some colleagues who’d been to our house recently.  “You really are very good with little kids,” I said.  “You’re very gentle with them, and you play very carefully, and you always try to help them.  You know, you might think about doing that when you’re a big man and you have a job—you might be a good helper someplace where they work with little kids.”

”Michael,” he said with some exasperation, “I’m going to be a Marine.”

“Excuse me?  Did you say a Marine?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Where did that come from?  You mean a Marine like a soldier?”

“No,” he said, waving me off, “a marine biologist.” Ah, you always have to wait for the other shoe.  A tall order, this—but he does know the differences between seals and sea lions, and he knows more about sharks than most sixth graders.  And despite his speech delays, he does say “cartilaginous fish” pretty clearly.

Now, if you want to read a really remarkable family story, check out this fine piece of work by Chris Clarke, which I recommend highly even though Chris has seen fit to send me the Infernal Book Meme (which I’ll get to when I get to it).

Posted by on 04/04 at 08:55 AM

  1. I’m fairly certain I couldn’t say “cartilaginous” very quickly when I was in the 6th grade. I dare say I didn’t know what it meant back then, either.

    Great stories.

    Posted by Roxanne  on  04/04  at  12:25 PM

  2. Smart kid. I think I’d like to be a marine biologist when I grow up, too.

    Posted by PZ Myers  on  04/04  at  12:31 PM

  3. If that doesn’t work out, there’s always architect or city planner. wink He’ll just need to watch out for the Van Buren boys…

    Posted by Sadly, No!  on  04/04  at  12:51 PM

  4. Loved the image of Jamie with his hand on the wallet.  I’ve been doing the same thing with my new chainsaw this past week.

    Posted by Doghouse Riley  on  04/04  at  12:59 PM

  5. And if that doesn’t work out, there’s always marine biology education at the aquarium.

    Posted by  on  04/04  at  02:22 PM

  6. I was going to wax on about how every well-equipped wallet also needs several postage stamps and a picture of a dog named Lucy in it, but suddenly, I’m distracted by the vision of a Stihl 260 Pro.

    Posted by  on  04/04  at  02:48 PM

  7. Again, Michael, thanks for the link despite my cruelly infecting you with that meme.

    I love the Jamie stories: I don’t know whether it’s intrinsic to him or to your interpretation (or mine, for that matter), but in your telling he’s just got this wonderful Everyman quality. Everyboy, perhaps.  It seems his sense of parental chain yankage is highly honed: always an excellent quality in an adolescent.

    Posted by Chris Clarke  on  04/04  at  03:27 PM

  8. well Michael, Jamie is CLEARLY wise enough to know better than to join George Bush’s military...can’t say that much for a ton of kids nearly twice his age, can we? not to mention Jamie’s ability to correctly employ 5 syllable words, which is more than we can even say for the current President!

    i always did wish i could have been Jacques Cousteau…

    -L.

    “No,” he said, waving me off, “a marine biologist.”

    Posted by  on  04/04  at  04:59 PM

  9. Thank you for the link to Chris’s site and story.  There is a blessing in life when the vast majority of those types of moments and times go gratefully unnoticed.  Only later, during the various reports in news or in court documents, does someone realize how close they had come to being another victim of desperately dark people. 

    I too am happy to read about Jamie, if only, as the father of a 6th grader, i can see how that particular generation has some powerful and wonderful gifts that might make it all okay.  It is reassuring that kids across this nation are smarter and wiser than we would expect them to be.

    Posted by  on  04/04  at  05:23 PM

  10. I’m 45 and I’d say, *in general*, kids--gawk, how condescending that sounds; so, anyone under 18--are better informed, more aware of the world, more involved than comparably-aged kids during my time.  I know that my years of being racked with guilt because of being gay wouldn’t have happened if I’d had the Net around.

    Michael, I’m sorry if this is a touchy subject and I’ll understand completely if you flame me back, but what is “wrong” with Jamie, in that he looks slightly like he has Downs and you mentioned his speech habit.  Just curious, but I couldn’t find any mention of it on the site.

    Posted by  on  04/04  at  06:41 PM

  11. Now you all have me thinking about that table saw I want since I’ve discovered pvc pipe.  A woman and her table saw. Sigh.

    Posted by  on  04/04  at  08:30 PM

  12. Yep, Jim, Jamie has Down syndrome.  I mention it (at some length) in a couple of the essays linked to this site, but of course I shouldn’t assume that everyone’s familiar with him.  Anyway, that’s the cause of his speech delay.

    Posted by Michael  on  04/04  at  08:58 PM

  13. Whoa, cold sweat in the middle of story two.  I’m glad that ended happily!  Having a teen decide the army is the place for them must be an ever-more-common parental nightmare.  Like in that Harper’s magazine article about deserters with the kid who decided to join up because (in part) because he wanted to test himself against the kind of discipline that he felt wasn’t provided by his vegan, home-schooling, Pacific Northwest parents.

    Posted by  on  04/04  at  09:36 PM

  14. Decidedly off topic:  is it to early to start gloating about the Carolina win over Illinois?

    I love these stories of Jamie. I have a cousin who is autistic, with other disabilities.  His questioning about rights and responsibilities were brought to a head when his younger brother received his driver’s license.  Nothing like a little fraternal competition to bring out the best in him, though:  he decided to take courses at a community college (since his brother had gone to university), is now living on his own and holds a part-time job. Pennsylvania seems to be doing its part in terms of support, though my aunt (in Swarthmore) has been fighting this fight for the past 25 years.

    Posted by  on  04/04  at  11:47 PM

  15. Dear Michael: I miss hanging out with Jamie. I’ll be expecting those books in the mail, my friend. Could you please include a copy of Public Access with them as well? As you know, I’ve read, cited and taught Public Access, but someone stole my copy in 2000, when the Heels were in the Final Four for the last time.... Well, it wasn’t double digits, Dr. Bérubé, but you well know it could have been. The Illini were brave though. It’s just that they were playing Carolina.

    PS: yoú’ll get the CDs anyhow, by the way.

    Posted by Idelber  on  04/04  at  11:51 PM

  16. I do own Marginal Forces/Cultural Centers, The Employment of English, and Higher Education under Fire, so don’t worry about those.

    Posted by Idelber  on  04/04  at  11:55 PM

  17. Jamie may have to go to school out of state to get his dose of marine biology—the nonsense in Dover, PA is starting to spread to the state legislature.

    I’d recommend Minnesota for selfish personal reasons, but we don’t have much “marine” going on, and maybe he should use it as an excuse to get out of Happy Valley and go to school in Hawaii, instead.

    Posted by PZ Myers  on  04/04  at  11:59 PM

  18. SneakySnu, Idelber, I will not try to feign indifference or bluff my way through this loss.  It is insupportable.  I will not recover for days, even weeks.  No, Idelber, it could not have been double digits, for precisely the reason that it was double digits—not just at halftime, but even after that critical three-minute opening of the second half—and the Illini came back anyway.  Yes, we came back only to tie—but we came back twice, and on neither occasion did we rely on 12-0 runs.  We just wore you down in the man-on-man coverage, and outfinessed you on the perimeter.  And yet the semiotics of the game would have been radically different if Williams had hit that three when it was 70-70 with two minutes left; or if Luther Head had hit that three, one minute later, when we were down 72-70; or if Williams had hit the two after Ingram’s righteous o-rebound; or if Luther had tied it at 73 with 20 seconds left.  You know I’m not talking about desperation shots, chucks, and bricks here—each and every single one of those four critical misses involved fine passing and good looks at the basket.  You Tar Heels escaped with your lives, having proved yourselves unable to cope with our screens—after the first 25 minutes during which we proved ourselves unable to stop your enormous steroid-enhanced May guy as he did his Shaq Shuffle in the paint.  Not that I’m bitter or anything.

    Idelber, the books are in the mail, or will be as soon as I recover.  Maybe by July or August.  PZ, just let me know (a) which states recognize sharks as cartilaginous fish, and (b) which states recognize them as being 350 million years old.  That will tell me and Jamie everything we need to know—as we train to become Marines.

    Posted by Michael  on  04/05  at  12:06 AM

  19. I’d recommend Minnesota for selfish personal reasons, but we don’t have much “marine” going on,

    Hel-LO? Western Interior Seaway? Cretaceous Epoch? Big Honking Sharks in New Ulm?

    (Damn Holocenocentrics.)

    Posted by Chris Clarke  on  04/05  at  12:13 AM

  20. Consider yourself lucky. My daughter is figuring out what college she wants to go to with the intention of eventually going to work for...the FBI.

    Help.

    Posted by tbogg  on  04/05  at  01:58 AM

  21. Hmm. If only there were some sort of book on past FBI abuses that one could hand to tbogg’s daughter… but try as I might I just can’t think of one.

    Posted by Chris Clarke  on  04/05  at  02:18 AM

  22. I always love the Jaime stories.

    I wonder, since my only/first child has Down syndrome, do parents with typically developing kids wonder so much about what their kids will do when they grow up?  Do they take such an active role in making career suggestions?  Maybe, maybe not.  Maybe it’s an extension of the feeling we (or at least I) have of being more in control of this child’s life.  Already my little one, while fiercely independent in her own way, is more dependent on me than most kids her age are with their parents.  It will be interesting to see what she makes of her adult life, and what my role in it will be.

    Yeah, but Houdini didn’t have these hips

    Posted by Sarahlynn Lester  on  04/05  at  03:01 AM

  23. The addition of the word “Marine” to any career instantly transforms it into a glamorous one, as a friend of mine discovered:

    “Data Consultant” = boring
    “Marine Data Consultant” = interesting.

    “Retail Manager” = boring
    “Marine Retail Manager” = interesting

    “Actuary” = boring
    “Marine Actuary” = interesting

    “Professor of Cultural Studies” = boring
    “Professor of Marine Cultural Studies” = interesting.

    Posted by  on  04/05  at  05:48 AM

  24. The addition of the word “Marine” to any career instantly transforms it into a glamorous one

    The military equivalent is to add ‘Special’. grin

    I think I must have inadvertently studied Marine Biology rather than just normal Biology. Certainly my degree course involved a lot of getting up very early and being shouted at.

    -Now, can anyone in the group tell me some of the features that indicate Ichthyostega was a primitive amphibian?
    - Sir, yes sir! Sir, Ichthyostega’s strongly developed shoulder girdle and lungs indicate it lived at least part of its life out of water, sir! Also its legs were clearly used for walking on land, sir!
    -Bullshit! Eryops was the earliest truly walking amphibian! There is no evidence Ichthyostega was able to walk rather than slither! Down on the lab floor and give me fifty!

    Posted by  on  04/05  at  09:19 AM

  25. I dunno, it might be cool to work for the FBI and then become a whistle-blower. The prison time would suck though.

    Posted by Craig  on  04/05  at  01:19 PM

  26. Thanks for the reply Michael.  In any case, Jamie rocks.  I’d like to recommend California for him, despite his ghostly pale skin.  I believe the community college in Ventura has a good program and I’m sure places like U San Francisco, Humboldt, UC Santa Barbara and UC Santa Cruz do as well.  Of course, if you’re worried about Jamie becoming a pot-smoking hippie, you might want to avoid the UC Santa Cruz option.

    Posted by  on  04/05  at  09:32 PM

  27. Because no one smokes pot at UCSF, Humboldt, or Isla Vista.

    Posted by Chris Clarke  on  04/05  at  09:36 PM

  28. I just read Mr. Clarke’s posting via the link you provided and was quite moved.  I can’t really speak to what he writes, because I am fully at a loss for words.

    I just wanted to say thank you for the link and congratulations on having such a fine son.  It is certainly an important responsibility that we raise our children correctly, and that process can sometimes be tedious, but our reward, our pleasure, our honor comes in being able to tell stories about them with pride and a whistful smile left marking the lips long after the telling is complete.

    Congratulations.  Fatherhood is a beautiful purpose.

    Posted by  on  04/05  at  11:49 PM

  29. And this is why the Jamie stories are the best part of this crazy blog…

    Posted by  on  04/10  at  01:23 PM

  30. eesftrww rlywkkwo qjhaucef http://dpsebhha.com blfswzvu zgsavdjl

    Posted by aeidsofa  on  12/31  at  08:34 PM

  31. Loved the image of Jamie with his hand on the wallet.  I’ve been doing the same thing with my new chainsaw this past week.It is certainly an important responsibility that we raise our children correctly, and that process can sometimes be tedious, but our reward, our pleasure,

    Posted by Enzara  on  11/18  at  03:09 AM

  32. I am in love with your quality articles! I wish I had time and patience to make my blog like yours. Thanks for the informative information you share. Bookmarked your blog.

    Posted by Part Time MBA Colleges  on  12/03  at  11:18 AM

  33. My children love this Jami. I read it outloud to my 5 and 7 year olds.Just a nice simple story of a boy and his favourite stuffed toy. I will share these stories with them. I am sure it will be big surprise for them.

    Posted by adaptateur  on  12/07  at  01:28 AM

  34. Smart kid !! i liked the story ... it is different as well interesting, keep it up

    Management Development

    Posted by Management Development  on  10/21  at  01:42 AM

  35. Jamie stories are the best… Thanks for the sharing…

    Posted by Enterprise Performance Management  on  10/31  at  07:14 AM

Name:

Email:

Location:

URL:

Remember my personal information

Notify me of follow-up comments?

Submit the word you see below:


Next entry: Tar Heels Claim Controversial Championship

Previous entry: World News Tonight

<< Back to main