Home | Away

Greetings from the Houston Zoo

image

It’s Monday Cobra Statue Blogging!

And yes, that’s a jacket Jamie is wearing, even though we’re in southeast Texas:  on Sunday, as we toured the zoo and the museum of natural science (which was crammed full of pro-evolution propaganda, as it turned out), we found to our dismay that the so-called “laws” of “physics” had been suspended for a 24-hour period.  It was in the high 70s on Saturday and I hear that Houston is in the mid 70s today, but for our Sunday excursion it was in the low 50s with 20-mph winds.  The models of the Earth’s atmosphere and climate that we consulted in the natural science museum itself suggest that this is impossible, which leads me to conclude that science does not, in fact, have all the “answers.” I therefore announce the formation of a new school of thought devoted to the proposition that there is a nonhuman and possibly divine “intelligence” behind our seemingly random daily weather patterns.  I’m thinking of calling it “Intelligent Meteorology.” But I’m open to other suggestions!

Then we caught our 4 pm flight to Baltimore, got to our car at 9:30, drove home through the freezing rain and pulled into the driveway at 1 am this morning.  Blogging will resume tomorrow when I’ve recovered from the trip.

Posted by on 03/28 at 04:16 PM

  1. how about Celestial Beings Impulsive Weather Disorder(CBIWD)?

    discovered you thru the cover story
    in this week’s New Haven Advocate
    http://tinyurl.com/3exut

    Posted by Rev. Richard K. Stimson aka Bear  on  03/28  at  06:14 PM

  2. Is it just me, or is Jamie looking way too cool in that photo? I wouldn’t touch even a model of a cobra.

    Posted by  on  03/28  at  06:50 PM

  3. Great pic!

    What you’ve uncovered is obviously a corollary to the non-existence of gravitation, which as Einstein himself admitted in a deathbed confession is “only a theory.”

    Billions of physicists nationwide are now looking closely at the rival notion of Intelligent Sucking, and I think the application of this FACT to the situation you describe should be obvious to all but phony SO-CALLED “scientists.”

    One need only postulate a Sucking Agent – not necessarily bound by the laws of the universe as we know them – capable of Intelligently Sucking us all to the surface of the Earth and the answer to the meterological problem you pose is clear. You, and your son, and the Houston air around you, were Intelligently Suckled.

    Supporting this analysis is the FACT that SO-CALLED “scientists” have been so far unable to explain: namely, that Texas sucks AND blows simultaneously, which is deemed impossible by Establishment Science.

    Posted by Chris Clarke  on  03/28  at  06:54 PM

  4. As the iconoclastic thinker that I am, I place the blame squarely on a lone butterfly in China. If and when some scientist comes up with a theory to explain my chaotic concept, I’ll put in a request to call it the Jamié Effect… or should that be Affect?

    Posted by  on  03/28  at  07:49 PM

  5. "Weather” is just a theory.  Keep telling yourself that, it makes the wind chill factor seem not so bad.

    Posted by Sean  on  03/28  at  08:11 PM

  6. Michael, you illustrate precisely why we need to return Mother Nature to her proper place in the classroom.  Of course she cannot be represented as a single mother so I suggest that we pair her up with Zeus - I find it ridiculous that a powerful god like Zeus is relegated to high school mythology classes when his impact on this world is undeniable.

    Posted by  on  03/28  at  09:24 PM

  7. Samson and Dedrizzle.

    Posted by  on  03/28  at  09:31 PM

  8. You can probably take on a lot of sacred cows without jeopardizing your standing in Lion Country, but I’d think at least twice before messing with the Meteorology Dept.  (And who’s really calling the shots at The Weather Channel, by the way?)

    Posted by  on  03/28  at  09:35 PM

  9. I didn’t know weather had predictable patterns; that would imply modelling of some sort, and then computers get involved, and people talking about what happened in the past and will happen in the future, but not about what is happening right now.  Better not to acknowledge patterns and forecasts and such.  Maybe we could agree to not talk about IT at all; ignore the whole concept all together.

    Posted by  on  03/28  at  10:50 PM

  10. Intellishizzle Thordrizzle Theory may be more like it, which can feel colder with the Medusa Chillin’ Factor.

    Posted by Kevin Hayden  on  03/29  at  03:33 AM

  11. Terrific photo.

    You fly into Baltimore and drive home?

    I don’t even fly in and out of Baltimore and I’m hella closer.

    Posted by Roxanne  on  03/29  at  09:37 AM

  12. Roxanne - maybe he likes Baltimore’s fantastic roads (I’m packing epoxy next time I have to drive through that city, I swear)?

    Posted by  on  03/29  at  10:06 AM

  13. A road is a flattened-out wheel, rolled up in the belly of an airplane.

    Posted by Roxanne  on  03/29  at  10:16 AM

  14. Flying into BWI and then driving? Sounds like a Southwest itinerary. I live in TX, and have BTDT. You’d think that the fact that Southwest goes into Philly now would help, but it does not, unless you like changing planes.

    Great photo! And sign me up for “IM” theory. There is no logical explanation of the weather here.

    Posted by  on  03/29  at  10:56 AM

  15. What a wonderful picture!

    Posted by  on  03/29  at  11:09 AM

  16. Actually, there is an equivalent to “Intelligent Meteorology”.  The oil and coal industries sent out lobbyists to weather reporters in the U.S. to convince them not to ever mention anthropogenic global climate change.  Real meteorologists are quite pissed off about the whole thing.

    Posted by  on  03/29  at  11:12 AM

  17. Glad to hear that IM is already taking hold, Rich-- and that it’s so well-funded, too!  But I question your use of the term “real meteorologists.” Surely their perspective is only one of many valid perspectives.

    And Roxanne, Rob, spare-- had I been flying by myself, I would have left from State College, like a sane person, and returned Sunday morning.  But because Jamie came along, I had to search for flights that left Houston late enough on Sunday to allow us some time at the zoo and the museum.  The only game in town was a direct flight on Continental from BWI.  I didn’t have to deal with Baltimore’s roads, but I did have to drive in the rain on I-83 from the PA-MD border to Harrisburg, and that road is one of the worst stretches of interstate in the country:  narrow, badly paved, and dangerous.  Curiously, in Maryland I-83 opens out and becomes a thing of beauty.  Well, it becomes driveable, anyway.

    Posted by Michael  on  03/29  at  12:09 PM

  18. How long has the new picture been up?

    Posted by Alex  on  03/29  at  12:42 PM

  19. Now, that’s not nice, Alex.  I’ll have you know that when I’m not hosting The Gong Show, I moonlight as a spy and assassin for the CIA.  And I have your IP address.

    Posted by  on  03/29  at  01:04 PM

  20. It’s impressive that you have time left to teach and harass those poor, oppressed conservative students, what with your various heroic efforts in far-flung locales.

    Posted by  on  03/29  at  01:13 PM

  21. Aw, shucks, Rob!  But really I’ve only done two out-of-town gigs this semester-- Illinois and Rice.  The Hawaii thing happened over our winter break, and I’ve had to cancel a trip to Arizona next month (for the Cultural Studies Association conference, no less).  So even though I’m on leave this semester (don’t tell anyone! --but that’s how I’m getting all this work done), I really can’t do more than three invited gigs per term.

    Posted by  on  03/29  at  01:27 PM

  22. "various heroic efforts in far-flung locales”

    Father, Professor, and....lucha-wrestling secret agent!!!! Michael is the mild-mannered identity of
    this fella heah:

    http://www.fantomas-lives.com/fanto5d.htm

    We only hope that someone in academe picks up the cost of the luchador costume and masks.

    Posted by David Ross McIrvine  on  03/29  at  01:34 PM

Name:

Email:

Location:

URL:

Remember my personal information

Notify me of follow-up comments?

Submit the word you see below:


Next entry: Post-Dieter blogging

Previous entry: Off to Houston

<< Back to main