Home | Away

The return of Mister Answer Man

You’ve got questions, Mister Answer Man has answers.  That’s one of the reasons his name is Mister Answer Man!  Let’s go to the mailbag.

Dear Mister Answer Man: Is this election over?
-- L. P. Berra, Bronx, NY

Mister Answer Man replies: That’s a very good question, and I want to consider it carefully.  OK, I did.  And I think you should just STFU.

Dear Mister Answer Man: Oh, come on.  Obama is up by eleventy billion nationwide, he’s holding all the Kerry states and leading in Missouri, Florida, Ohio, Iowa, Virginia, Colorado, New Hampshire, Idoming, West Caledonia, and maybe even North Carolina.  The McCain campaign now consists of “Obama is a terrorist’s best friend” leavened by references to “my fellow prisoners.” Lighten up already, dude—all this is not good news for John McCain. 
-- G. H. Gallup, Jefferson, IA

Mister Answer Man replies: Clearly, you don’t understand very much about polling, Mr. Gallup—if that is your real name.  First of all, as Chris Bowers soberly reports, the idea that Obama is going to crush McCain like a goldwaterbug is simply delusional.  Only in the nation’s English and Comparative Literature departments could Obama pull off the 97-3 win he deserves (with the 3 going, of course, to Nader).  Thirty percent of the American public would vote for a fire hydrant if the hydrant promised to overturn Roe v. Wade; another ten percent approve of Fire Hydrant’s plan to cut taxes and burdensome federal regulations; and another five to eight percent thinks that Fire Hydrant will be tough on crime terrorism.  Add to that the fact that no Democratic nominee has pulled more than 50 percent of the popular vote in the past 150 years save for FDR and LBJ, and you’ll understand why it’s a good idea to count on a close race right to the finish.

Dear Mister Answer Man: Back in August I went to see the New York Mets play the Florida Marlins. The Mets won 8-6, and at the time they had a slight lead over the Phillies in the NL East.  But the weird thing about the game was that the Mets had not one but two four-run leads, 4-0 and 8-4, and yet the crowd was restive and querulous throughout the entire game.  Every time a Marlin got a base hit, even if it was a dribbling single with two outs and nobody on base, the entire stadium of forty-something thousand went “mmmeeeeehhhhhh” and people began grousing to their neighbors that now was the moment the collapse would begin.  It was almost as if they knew the Mets would find a creative and heartbreaking way to lose, and were waiting (with dread but also with a perverse fascination) for the inevitable crushing defeat. What was up with that?  And do you think it might serve as an apt metaphor for the way Democrats feel every four years?
-- J. Manuel, Flushing, Queens

Mister Answer Man replies: You ask a profound (and, I must say, somewhat leading) question, Mr. Manuel.  The short answer is yes: the Mets lost four-run leads twenty-nine times in 2008, beating their 2007 record of twenty-six coughed-up hair-ball losses*, and only two weeks before you attended that Mets-Marlins game, the Mets gave up six runs in the ninth inning in a critical divisional matchup against those Phillies. The grumbling Shea crowd you encountered in early August was what sports psychologists call a “traumatized bunch of MFers,” that is, a group of people who not only fear the worst (often with good reason) but also believe that their fears actually call the worst into being, and who are therefore consumed with guilt about the possibility that their fears may influence reality.  As it happened, the Mets were in fact incapable of holding a lead, in a game or in the division, and incapable of getting base hits in critical situations during crucial games, so the “querulous” fan reaction at Shea would appear to be quite justified.  For many years during the period 1967-2003, Red Sox fans were the paradigmatic case of a traumatized bunch of MFers, but in more recent years they have started to become overweening, Yankee-esque bullies who expect to win every game every year.  Chicago Cubs fans have undergone a different evolutionary path: sometimes their team is made up of Dukakisian sad sacks who finish 77-85—you know, bad, but not McGovernistic 58-104 abysmal—and sometimes the team consists of talented Gore-Kerry almost-rans who prolly shoulda woulda coulda won it all except for Steve Bartman’s amicus brief in Bush v. Gore.

Mister Answer Man should add, on a personal note, that you should never, ever listen to him when he says something is over before it’s over.  In 2003 he believed the Cubs were a lock for the NL pennant once they went up 3-1 on the Marlins; last year he said out loud—on September 12, to be exact—that there was no way the Mets could blow the division now, up seven games with seventeen to play.  And just this past June, he turned off game four of the Lakers-Celtics series midway through the third quarter, knowing the Celtics could not possibly come back from 20 points down with 18 minutes to play.  (They closed the gap to two by the end of the quarter and went on to win by six.) So even though Mister Answer Man is quite good at predicting Super Bowls, thanks to his patented scientific formula, he is possibly the World’s Worst when it comes to missing epic collapses and comebacks.

Dear Mister Answer Man: The sheer barking madness of the right-wing blogosphere never ceases to amaze me.  Just yesterday I happened by that “Powerline” place and read this: “This may be a case of the irresistible force meeting the immovable object. The political, media, cultural and social establishments are determined to elect the pro-status quo, anti-change candidate, Barack Obama, as President. The power and money arrayed behind Obama seem unbeatable. At the same time, it is inconceivable that the American people would elect a socialist President. So, if this report is correct, something’s got to give.” The amazing breaking news is that Barack Obama was once a member of the New Party.  “This report” turns out to be the work of one of those freepy people who apparently had never heard of the New Party until a few days ago, and now all the hounds are baying, like so: “J. Brown of Politically Drunk on Power has dug up multiple documentary sources (with hyperlinks) proving that Barack Obama was a member of the New Party, despite alleged attempts to cover up his tracks by scrubbing evidence. He or she deserves tremendous praise for doing this detective work.” What is the matter with these people?  Will they bark at every shiny object they see?  I know that if I ask, “are they stupid or ignorant,” you’ll tell me this isn’t an either-or kind of blog.  But this time I’m really puzzled.  Perhaps, as a former member of the New Party, you can help clear this up.
-- J. Rogers, Madison, WI

Mister Answer Man replies: Actually, Mr. Rogers, this time they’ve hit pay dirt.  The New Party was indeed founded by the Union of Soviet Democratic Socialists in 1992, and its mission was to abolish private property, nationalize the means of production, and put all white people over fifty years of age to work in underground Communist sugar mines.  It also advocated “fusion” ballots, which would destroy Western civilization and also require your daughter to marry Lindsay Lohan.  But Mister Answer Man joined because he liked the Communism, and he’s willing to bet that Obama did too.  Seriously, if the folks at No Quarter get a hold of this shocking new information, it could be a real game changer.

Uh-oh.

Dear Mister Answer Man: I know you don’t want to jinx anything, but can’t you please please please give us some idea of what Obama’s cabinet will look like?  Even just a few guesses?  It would be so much fun.
-- J. Jackson, Chicago, IL

Mister Answer Man replies: Oh, all right.  Just this once, just for you:

State: Stagger Lee
Defense: Huey Newton
Attorney General: Bigger Thomas
Labor: John Henry
Interior: Malik Shabazz X
Energy:  George Clinton
Agriculture: Ludacris
Commerce: Jack Johnson
Transportation: Rick James
Homeland Security: Kanye West
HHS: Blackazoid
HUD: Chuck D
Veterans Affairs: There will be no Secretary for Veterans Affairs
Education: Bill Ayres Aires Ayers

Mister Answer Man wishes good luck to all these worthy nominees!

* These numbers may be exaggerated or made up.

Posted by on 10/09 at 08:50 AM

  1. First time long time, Michael.  I am a Met fan and I feel exactly the same way your mysterious Manuel feels.  We all need middle relief. 

    But should we take a dark hint from the re-upping of Minaya???

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  10:57 AM

  2. Yo, Mr. Answer Man,

    Who used to open his stump speech with the following line? “When I am elected President of the United States, my first executive order will be to change the name of the White House! To the Blues House.”

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  11:09 AM

  3. Made my final pilgrimage to Shea on Sunday Sept. 14 (first time there since 1972! Dragged my daughter along, and she was a good sport about it). The Mets were up 4-2 over Atlanta, then gave up 5 runs in the top of the ninth. Middle relief? Any freakin relief would have been good.
    George Clinton as Energy Czar? Perfect. I believe he knows more about energy than anybody in the whole country, as proven right here.

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  11:16 AM

  4. Look, when my Dad brought me up as a Red Sox fan, it looked like a good idea.  It was a great tool for teaching the benefits of delayed gratification (if he could wait all his life for the Sox to win, I could wait for a chia pet, and so on).  And it was responsible for some great moments, like when I was at Fenway and saw Mike Greenwell hit an inside-the-park home run.  Besides, I like Neil Diamond and the Dropkick Murphies.  The team has been a really good fit for me, all around.

    So they’re winning now and there’s a certain triumphalism in the air, sure.  But in October 2004, when my father said “I think we should all be standing now” and wished that his own father had lived to see it, I was there to witness - for the first time in my life - my father crying.  And if a certain Yankee-ish assholism among my fellow fans is the price I have to pay for that moment, then so be it.

    Plus, I finally got a chia pet.  Too cool.

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  11:23 AM

  5. So, if I’m reading this right, Powerline puts forth two claims:

    1. Obama is the “pro-status quo, anti-change candidate.”
    2.  He would also be a “socialist President.”

    So, logically, (as Sir Bedevere would say), we are now living in a socialist state.  Is that why my healthcare is free?

    Capcha:  “group” How socialist!

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  11:36 AM

  6. Mr. Answer Man,

    Nice locker room speech, both yours and Mr. Bowers’, and it may be necessary, seein’ as how much of Left Blogtopia gives the impression the only national election it’s in any way familiar with is 2004, but this one’s as much of a lock as it could be; Honest John needs three cards for his inside straight, 7 high.  Rove/Schmidt tactics aren’t gonna change anything.  Don’t listen to polls, sure, especially extrapolations from a single weekend’s snapshot, but feel free to sniff the air.  Obama was in Indianapolis yesterday, fer chrissakes.

    I’d turn the advice on its head:  if McCain pulls less than 49% it’s a sea change, given that he has the advantage of his party controlling the terms of the debate for the past thirty years.  Reagan beat Carter by 9 pts. with 7 or 8 points going to John Anderson, who was Carter without the baggage, and that one was called a Revolution.  Hell, remember that the Bush campaign was using the term “mandate” in December 2000.

    Posted by Doghouse Riley  on  10/09  at  11:45 AM

  7. If George Clinton is going to be Sec. of Energy then that’s all I need to know—Obama’s got my vote!  By 2012, the electrical grid will be humming with the power of sweet clean funk, and cars will be running on pure, hydrocarbon free groove fumes.  Good times are on the way, America.  Good, funky times.

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  11:56 AM

  8. Dear Mr. Answer Man,
    Is the lack of popularity of televised hockey in the U.S. related to it being unsuitable for use in political metaphors? Or do I have that backward?

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  12:21 PM

  9. I don’t know about the Johnnie-come-latelies, but if you think this Red Sox fan “expects to win every game every time” then you got the wrong answer this time, my friend – and for a reason with which you might sympathize.  When Dice-K (or Beckett!) takes 110 pitches to get through five innings, then a) there’s a loooong way to go before closing time; and b) the difference between David Aardsma and say Grant Balfour or J. Arredondo is as that between night and day (or the other way around).  Even Hideki Okajima allowed 17 of 21 inherited runners to score, although I have to admit I just made that stat up.

    And did you tell L. P. Berra to STFU?  Geez, even I wouldn’t do that!

    “europe,” where they would have no clue what we are here discussing.

    Posted by Dave M  on  10/09  at  12:24 PM

  10. Thank you Mr. Answer Man for the link to No Quarter. Boy did I almost make a real big mistake! But now that I know that, Gov. Keating strongly infers and correctly, I suspect, that Barack Obama is the front-man for these radicals. I can see how misguided I was. Wow, we almost lost our country to people who don’t honor and respect the constitution!

    I’m afraid that John McCain’s deep sense of people honor isn’t serving him well. Country First, John! I know it goes against everything your campaign has been about, but there must be some way you can help spread this message.

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  12:43 PM

  11. I’m sorry. Atomic Dog does NOT constitute “safe nuclear.”

    Posted by Chris Clarke  on  10/09  at  12:46 PM

  12. Hey, you forgot that Obama will nominate Carlos Delgado as Secretary for the Department of Mindless Patriotism and Dreadful First Halves.

    Posted by George  on  10/09  at  01:04 PM

  13. JP @ 10:  Yeah, they’re always looking out for our security over there at No Quarter.  In a strongly-inferring kind of way, too.

    Dave M @ 9:  Sure, sometimes your pitchers throw a lot of pitches.  I feel their pain.  But that just makes the ensuing eight-run comeback all the more fun, no, especially when Youkilis and Ortiz go deep?  And yeah, I had to tell LP to STFU.  Terrible things happen when I say “OK, this one is over.” Got that, Doghouse?

    Actually, Mr. Riley @ 6, that’s part of my point:  Republicans are very good at declaring “man dates” after squeaking out 50.1 - 49.9 victories, and they never worry about snatching defeat from the jaws etc. late in the game.  If they had Obama’s numbers right now, we’d be hearing nothing but crowing, and Sean Hannity would swell up to twice his size.

    Ken @ 8:  Either way you frame the question, it’s all Gary Effing Bettman’s fault.  Though I have to say I like watching the NHL on The Ocho.

    fardels bear @ 5, thanks for your insightful look into the powerful Powerline logic-making device.  Sometimes teh stupid over there is so multifaceted I lose track of some of its finer points.

    jenniebee @ 4, this blog believes that one must always historicize, and so I agree with you that 2004 was a tear-jerking moment, not least because of that epic comeback against the Yankees, which not only avenged 2003 but seems to have thrown the NYers off stride ever since.  Just as the bourgeoisie was a progressive force prior to 1848, the Red Sox in 2004 are all right.  But now you’ve taken to beating up on a series of sad sacks from Cleveland, Colorado, and (soon) Tampa Bay, and I can hear the Nelson Munch laugh from here. 

    Bill @ 2:  I was going to say Adlai Stevenson, of course, but on second thought decided that this guy might more likely.

    Hester @ 1, thanks so much for stopping by!  But who is this mysterious “Minaya”?  Are you referring to the guy who expelled Willie Randolph from the New Party for being insufficiently Marxist?

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  01:06 PM

  14. Fortunately, there’s the fallback of Clean Cosmic-Slop Technology.

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  01:06 PM

  15. I can hear the Nelson Munch laugh from here

    You mean, a mocking laugh somehow tinged with Nordic despair?  Works for me.

    Posted by Dave M  on  10/09  at  01:37 PM

  16. Thanks for the heads up on the underground Communist sugar mines. The other day I heard faint strains of the Archies coming from a nearby storm sewer. At the time I wrote is off as another 8-track player making its slow passage downstream to an eventual home at the bottom of the Gulf of Mexico.

    pour a little sugar on it yeah
    pour a little sugar on it honey
    pour a little sugar on it baby
    I’m gonna make your life so sweet, yeah yeah yeah

    Timeless.

    Posted by black dog barking  on  10/09  at  01:48 PM

  17. With all this loser talk, I want to give a shout out to spyder who once upon a time coined (as far as I know) the great appellation, PTSLD - Post-Traumatic Sports Loss Disorder.

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  02:14 PM

  18. Fortunately, I ODed on apples and apple products during Game 6 in ‘86 and could never pull seriously for a downstate team after that.  Unfortunately, I shifted my loyalties to the Bills just as I moved downstate for a time and can’t seem to give up the habit.  Trauma is a powerful force, no doubt.  You’ve gt the survivor guilt down, too:  I blame myself for voting “yes” to an on-campus poll that popped up in our course management system after the Bills were 4-0.  It, of course, asked whether they’d make the playoffs.  Perhaps being a fan means you never learn.

    And yet, it’s hard to say I am or have been a fan of the Democrats.  Seems their function since Reagan has been to impose austerity after Republicans blow up the economy.  Our good Gov. Paterson is most definitely in that tradition....

    Posted by The Constructivist  on  10/09  at  02:24 PM

  19. Dear Mr. Answer Man:
    Can I call ya Joe?
    That’s not my real question doggonnit.
    What’s the best way to pranounce the name a that country over there by Eye-raq? I heard That One say “Pock-ee-ston” th’other night in the debate against John McCain, a Maverick, but heck, mosta the Joe Sixpacks and Hockey Moms I know in this great country a ours say “Pack-a-stan.” I don’t wanna say it like I like wine or anything. Thanks, Joe!

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  02:41 PM

  20. You got it Mr. Answer Man, it was that one.

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  02:48 PM

  21. Dear Mr. Answer Man:

    I hear that you have some connections with people in those Departments of English and Comparative Literature you mentioned, and so I was wondering if you could tell me why it is that Sarah Palin doesn’t read newspapers, can’t form a coherent sentence, and yet seems to be channelling Charlotte Brontë’s narrator in *Jane Eyre*.

    Sarah Palin: “As Putin rears his head and comes into the air space of the United States of America, where do they go? It’s Alaska.”

    Charlotte Brontë’s narrator: “The third [painting] showed the pinnacle of an iceberg piercing a polar winter sky: a muster of northern lights reared their dim lances, close serried, along the horizon. Throwing these into distance, rose, in the foreground, a head,--a colossal head, inclined towards the iceberg, and resting against it. Two thin hands, joined under the forehead, and supporting it, drew up before the lower features a sable veil, a brow quite bloodless, white as bone, and an eye hollow and fixed, blank of meaning but for the glassiness of despair, alone were visible.”

    See what I mean, it’s Putin, right?  Granted, there are a few minor stylistic and syntactical differences between these passages, but gosh darnit, they’re basically the same.  Also.

    Any ideas?

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  05:15 PM

  22. My friends, this is some fine American discourse about the issues our children’s freedom asks the hardworking families how their values have the greatest freedom in the world. Also.

    Posted by Jason B  on  10/09  at  06:04 PM

  23. Mr. Answer First Dude,

    What, no sisters in the Chocolate City cabinet?

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  06:19 PM

  24. Pam Grier for HUD.  Kanye for head of FEMA.  That frees up Chuck D for Homeland Security, or, in other words, the Security of the 1st World, S1W.  There, too, he can implement his long-standing agenda of emergency preparedness, having become aware long ago that 911 is a joke.

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  06:54 PM

  25. What about Halle Berry?  Why no cabinet post for Halle Berry?  Halle Berry is fine!  I think she needs to be the first Secretary of BEING FINE!

    Posted by thepuppethead  on  10/09  at  07:49 PM

  26. What Fardels Bear said. I realise cognitive dissonance is a given for people as wingnutty as Powerline, but still. You’d think these people would realise quite how silly it makes them look, especially when Powerline don’t exactly fall into the “Bush is a liberal” camp.

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  08:04 PM

  27. If we’re nominating sisters, Angela could be National Security Advisor, unless they make a Department of FemiNazi Affairs…

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  08:24 PM

  28. My friends, I gave a lot of thought to the question of whether the al-Obama cabinet should have a reasonable degree of sistertude.  As you can plainly see, by this morning I was convinced that the lineup should consist entirely of Scary Black Men; but now that we’re talking about Pam and Angela, I have to say I’m glad these “web” “logs” have comment sections! (And thepuppethead, isn’t Ms. Berry already the Secretary of Being Fine?  Traditionally the title is bestowed by Esquire magazine, iirc.) Flipyrwhig’s HUD-FEMA-S1W tradeoff is quite brilliant (thanks!), but in response to jay-g I have to say that I was reserving the post of NSA for NWA.

    Also, don’t forget we still have Toni Morrison for Minister of Culture and Lani Guinier for the head of the DoJ’s Civil Rights Division.  Further suggestions along these lines are very welcome--

    Sarah @ 19:  thanks for stopping by!  I love your glasses, by the way.  And I believe the “Pock-a-stan” gaffe was covered very well by the boys at The Corner, who, I hear, have now embarked on a marathon showing of Red Dawn.  You might want to head on over and check it out.  Wolverines, Governor!

    Tim @ 21:  holy shit.  It’s pretty amazing what you find out when you read books!  I read all of them, any of them that have been in front of me all these years.

    And Dave @ 15:  You mean, a mocking laugh somehow tinged with Nordic despair?  Works for me.

    Yes, I thought it might.

    Posted by Michael  on  10/09  at  08:53 PM

  29. Surely Nelly would be better at Agriculture.

    Posted by s'dog  on  10/09  at  09:40 PM

  30. Joycelyn Elders - Commissar General of Pre-School Sex Education.

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  10:46 PM

  31. Amiri Baraka for poet laureate (in perpetuity, no takesies-backsies).

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  10:54 PM

  32. In fact, I would be surprised if Biden wasn’t ousted so Baraka could pull double duty as VP. The Obama-Baraka administration. I like the sound of that.

    captcha: instead

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  10:57 PM

  33. Baraka!  Damn.  Let me see if I can’t line him up for State after Stagger Lee shoots Billy and steps down from the position.

    And JP, I did think of Elders, but I’m told by sources close to the Obama campaign that Obama wants to oversee the pre-school sex ed himself.  Something about claymation models.

    Posted by Michael  on  10/09  at  11:18 PM

  34. Obama Baraka!
    What a wonderful pair
    Obama Baraka!
    Ain’t no passing care
    It means no worries
    For the rest of your days
    It’s our problem-free
    Philosophy
    Obama Baraka!

    ...I ban myself

    Posted by  on  10/09  at  11:56 PM

  35. Well, if we can bring back Jack Johnson to handle the Commerce Dept. (an inspired idea) then I want to nominate Sojourner Truth for press secretary. Yes, I know press secretaries don’t get nominated. I don’t care. People are always going on about speaking truth to power. How about power speaking truth to us? Or Truth speaking powerfully to us? I just think those daily press gaggles would get a LOT more interesting.

    But, uh, Rick James? I think he’s a little too scary.

    Posted by  on  10/10  at  12:03 AM

  36. Ayres ? i’ve seen that few times now,
    (on other blogs). is that something
    more sinister than a typo?
    Is this another crazy radical on the
    horizon?

    Posted by  on  10/10  at  01:04 AM

  37. dear mr. answer man:

    what about george clinton as the secretary of giving up the funk?

    Posted by skippy  on  10/10  at  01:30 AM

  38. Dear Mister Answer Man,

    Don’t be surprised if Ali is in the White House,
    Reverend Ike Secretary of the Treasury
    Richard Pryor Minister of Education
    Stevie Wonder Secretary of fiiiine arts
    And Miss Aretha Franklin the First Lady!

    Yrs,
    Mr. Clinton
    (no, the other one!)

    captcha:  “home”, as in DOWN home....

    Posted by  on  10/10  at  02:44 AM

  39. Please please Mister Answer Man, please tell me please:

    Now that we have learned that there are all sorts of assistant Attorneys General running around the DoJ, would you please offer some nominations for those positions responsible for drafting all the secret orders and rulings???

    If a manhole explodes in Brooklyn is that part (captcha) of the New Yankee Party plot to retake control of MLB???

    Posted by  on  10/10  at  04:31 AM

  40. s’dog @ 29:  Nelly at Agriculture, yes.  But now that you mention it, perhaps Cypress Hill would be even better.

    JP @ 34:  don’t ban yourself!  Come on back and write another one to the tune of “Can You Feel the Love Tonight.”

    Maud @ 35:  all right now!  And if we’re going to have Truth as WH press secretary, we’ve gotta have Ida B. Wells as solicitor general.

    anona @ 36:  Ayres is indeed a crazy radical on the horizon, and he is rearing his head and coming into our airspace.  You heard it here first!

    skippy @ 37:  sorry, but we need Clinton at Energy for the reason Sven offers in comment 3.  Flashlight!

    nick @ 38:  oooooooh, I can’t believe I forgot Rev. Ike.  And spyder @ 39, I’ll be sure to turn your question over to Bigger at DoJ.  First, though, I need to know:  what exactly is it about al-Obama that makes you want to serve him?

    Posted by Michael  on  10/10  at  06:50 AM

  41. Mister Answer Man:  Do you think there is any chance that Hussein Al-Obama might become President Of the Entire World?  I’m thinking this might help the financial problems. (captcha=price)

    Posted by mark  on  10/10  at  09:24 AM

  42. The “Ayres” spelling gives me all the proof I need that the Hollywood liberals are in cahoots with domestic bombers. Lew Ayres was a movie actor and a conscientious objector? It’s a cover for his bombing sympathizer tendencies.

    The Scary Black Man Presidential Cabinet would definitely be scarier with an outbreak of baby mamas in their midst. This is one way in which Condoleezza Rice might continue on in the Obama administration. A profusion of baby mamas would serve double duty, as this would send a signal to the McCain/Palin voters that their sanctity-of-life sensibilities are respected.

    This part is off topic: I just looked at the Wikipedia article on Rick Redfern, the “Doonesbury” character, and it says this: “Rick seems to have originated as a blend of Washington Post journalists Bob Woodward (played by Robert Redford in All the President’s Men) and Richard Cohen, who physically resembles Rick.” *spit take* What?? I looked at the pictures.

    Posted by Orange  on  10/10  at  09:37 AM

  43. Orange, I do love it when you fix my typos.  Have you noticed, btw, that biased New York Times crossword-puzzle maker-uppers have used “Obama” but not “McCain” in their puzzle thingies?

    And apparently Richard Cohen was once quite fetching.

    Posted by  on  10/10  at  11:17 AM

  44. Good gravy, the right-wing denizens of the blogosphere are tone-deaf and humorless. So many of the Politico commenters missed the point entirely and responded to David Levinson Wilk’s piece as if he weren’t just having a little fun. They must be too dim for crosswords, or they’d have been in on the joke.

    Thank you, Michael, for your appreciation of typo fixin’. You want to be careful about giving too much encouragement in such things, though. Pedants soak that stuff up like good liquor.

    Posted by Orange  on  10/10  at  01:48 PM

  45. You had me at “John Henry.”

    Posted by bitchphd  on  10/10  at  08:09 PM

  46. what exactly is it about al-Obama that makes you want to serve him?

    Well, you gotta serve somebody.  And i would happily volunteer to be the server of subpoenas on those war criminals for al-Obama and/or al-Osama.

    Posted by  on  10/10  at  09:10 PM

  47. If you have a Department of Transportation without a mothership in it, there will be a coup.

    Posted by Rev. Bob "Hussein Crispen  on  10/13  at  12:17 AM

Name:

Email:

Location:

URL:

Remember my personal information

Notify me of follow-up comments?

Submit the word you see below:


Next entry: Open letter to conservatives

Previous entry: Which one?

<< Back to main